in a fish.
You were never meant to take such pride in such work.
You were never meant to be happy like this.
I change the text in this section daily.
I’ve written ‘Terms and Conditions apply’ so often I’ve forgotten what it means.
Section 4 - It’s The End But The Moment Has Been Prepared For
Please tick this box.
Please tick it.
Any other form of symbol will be carved into my very living flesh and I will be dragged naked through the office while hooded figures chant ‘Forbidden are these signs, forbidden are your joys’.
Our office has no cleaner.
Salt tears erase all traces of the unexpected.
Please tick this box if you do not wish to never unduly yet perhaps often nonetheless rigorously deny receiving a complete absence of content, love letters in the sand, a consenting genital, coordinates, names and a weapon; hats, a blow up doll with your face on it, breath down your back (lukewarm and sticky), iodine, the scent of hiding, postal meats, a list of everything you wanted to be, none of the above, plus the occasional Catfishing scam.
Please tick this box if you do not wish to know.
Please tick this box if you do not wish.
Andrew Blair
Andrew Blair is a writer and performer based in Edinburgh, whose credits include Gutter, Valve and Auld Enemies project. He hosts the show Poets Against Humanity, and co-curates the Lies, Dreaming podcast.
Robophobia
Genius solver of Sudoku,
chess grandmaster that
cannot pick up pieces,
arms that dent the wall
but fail to find the handle
on a cup, wheels that need
a nice flat floor,
turning for just two hours
until the battery’s flat.
Unzip this plastic skin,
search for ambition
in the gears and motors.
You put a god in my machine, one
that chooses where the lightning
strikes, the cancer grows.
Make it a traveller from another village
where they do things wrong,
and therefore snatch
your history and friends
change your language, kill your songs.
Why scratch at that until it bleeds?
A simple ant, a slug
does better in the world
