“I’m fine.” I grin, steadily working. “I’m enjoying you—I always do—but… I don’t usually get to do these things.”
“Because I don’t let anyone do these things.”
Eventually, I draw back and ease two fingers inside. Jun groans, but then I feel him relax around me again.
After a couple of minutes of this, he surprises me when he moves his own hand between his legs, caresses his finger against my lubed hand, then slowly adds a third finger into himself to help me stretch him. Holy shit. He closes his indigo eyes tight and arches his neck to what we’re doing. Gasping through parted lips, he’s stunning, and I have to remind myself to breathe.
Our fingers pulse and stretch him, and with my free hand, I switch between caressing his tight tummy and gripping and squeezing his shaft. My aura has been pretty quiet since Jun pulled it in the bathtub, but watching him breathe and writhe underneath my hand is stirring it up again. Also, the urge to feed from him is starting to flood my consciousness. I’ve been focused on him, and my priority is that he feels comfortable with me and in this moment, but my hunger for him is slowly engulfing my senses like a dense fog rolling into a harbor.
“I’m ready.” He groans, opening his glowing eyes. I swallow hard as we gently remove our fingers.
I crawl forward, and Jun glides his palms against my hips to bring me down and closer to him, but my voice is serious. “Tell me if I should stop.”
He shakes his head against the pillow, biting his lip again. “You won’t need to stop.”
I grab myself as I rest lower in between his legs. My anxiety is present. I can feel it humming just at the edges of my consciousness, but I ignore it and stroke myself, trying not to get into my own head and focusing on this beautiful man underneath me.
When I place myself at his opening, Jun caresses down my skin and grips my arse with both hands, urging me inside. I slowly push through, watching him close his eyes and breathe with his mouth open slightly. He’s so warm and tight, his large hands clenching me. It’s honestly enough to push me over the edge right now when I haven’t done anything. But I inhale and close my eyes, then blow it out, focusing.
Before I even have a chance to pump into him, he shifts his hips up and into me. My breath catches, and I rest down on my elbows so I’m just above his face. Our foreheads and noses are perfectly in line, gently touching. He grips and drives himself into me again—tight and hard. His breath is puffing against my lips as they brush together. There’s no way I can keep this up for much longer. He feels too good, his scent is overwhelming me and my nature is hot and going wild. Everything is swelling like fire in my groin.
“Jun, I—” He grips me and rolls his hips up into my shaft this time, and I breathe a sound I only make when I’m with Jun.
He doesn’t speak, but tilts his head and places the softest kiss on my mouth. I feel one of his hands crawl between my cheeks, and his finger is teasing my opening as he drives himself into me again. When he sweetly brushes his nose into me, that pushes me over. I groan and let everything burning in my groin flourish, let it simultaneously rush out of me and up my spine to my brain. It makes our connection even wetter inside Jun and it makes me tremble.
While I’m still in the throes of it, the urge to feed from him is crippling—the desire and need almost painful. I haven’t fed from him at all since we’ve been back together, and I was afraid to ask, but now my body is shaking from want of it.
“Feed, sunshine. You don’t ever need to hesitate.”
I don’t know how he knows, but all I can do is lean down and lap my tongue against his neck before I bite into him and feed gratuitously—completely indulging in his divine blood. This blood I was awakened with. This blood that is, has been and will always be an integral part of me. I love him and the taste of him more than anything, so I pour it into him, wanting him to understand how much he means to me. How grateful I am for him.
When I’m done, I open my eyes, and the blueish-violet light is surrounding us again. Warmly cocooning us and making the dimly lit room brighter. I lick his neck, but when I try to pull out of his body, he wraps his arms around me and holds me tight against him.
“Thank you,” he says, exhaling. “For giving me this. All of this.”
I’m about to tell him that I would give him anything he wanted. Everything. But his chest is rising and falling in a slow rhythm underneath me and his eyes are closed. His grip is still warm and tight around my back and waist, so I don’t move. I let him hold me, even though he’s gradually falling asleep.
Fifty
Jae
In the morning, I open my eyes, and for a second, I’m very confused about being inside this posh cave. But I quickly remember where I am and what my life is now, so I inhale a deep breath to suck in the cool, damp air.
I can hear all manner of birds singing beyond the greenhouse just past the archway. The sun is shining brightly—practically pouring into the glass atrium. But from inside and where I’m lying in bed, it’s more shadowed in a muted white glow. There are stained-glass lamps meticulously positioned on shelves throughout the room, and all kinds of other glassy bits and bobs that shine in the dim light.
I’ve been able to see and experience quite a few beautiful things since I’ve started hanging out with these vampires, but honestly, this bedroom with its en-suite glass-encased bathroom takes the cake.
Usually… well, before, when I was human, I never woke up first. Jun always did. But apparently, I wore him out last night, didn’t I? Making our sex house look nice or whatever.
He’s halfway on his stomach, half on his side next to me and with his back to me. The white sheets are all bunched up low at his hips, so the full length of his spine is exposed. First, I run my fingers down the curve of it, because it’s beautiful—the soft concave of it juxtaposed to his muscled shoulder blades. Feeling greedy, I place one arm over his body so he’s trapped underneath me, then I kiss down the center of his back, enjoying the feel of his warm skin against my lips. When he groans and shifts, I pause. “Good morning.”
His voice is groggy, muffled. “Morning.”
I resume kissing the path down to his lower back, but I pause again to say, “You slept late.”
“Mm.”
“Did the skittish deer wear the wolf out?” I smirk. I’m not at all bothered by that characterization. It’s better than a raccoon, and it makes me seem much more majestic and graceful than I actually am.
Jun flips and turns toward me so fast that my heart skips. He grabs my arm and pulls so that I slide underneath him, then rests the full weight of his body on top of me. He’s heavy, and now I’m squished and flat against the bed, partially tangled in the sheets. I can only kind of move my arms at this point, so I press my hands to his chest and push. Honestly, I’m not putting much genuine effort into it though. “You’re heavy.”
In response, he locks his legs around mine, so now I’m really stuck. It’s so warm like this, and the sun shines a little bit brighter through the archway. I just breathe, calm and pressed into the soft mattress and underneath his weight. His soothing lavender scent. After a moment, my eyes flutter closed.
“Jae.”
“Mm?”
There’s a pause, and I open my eyes. I can’t see his face because his head is slightly above mine.
“I think it’s a good idea for you to talk to someone. I know you have some things to work through, but know that you fit in here. You belong with us. You are one of us. Everything else aside, please stop questioning that. Do you understand?”
I swallow hard, because it’s like he’s just punched me in the gut without any provocation. Everything wells up inside me at once, and the next thing I know, there are tears leaking from the corners of my eyes. I only have one hand free, so I lift it to wipe my face as best I can. My voice comes out faint. “Yes.”
He kisses the top of my head, then my forehead. He kisses the corner of my eye and I keep crying like a lemon, even though I’m happy. Really. He shifts down, still weighted on top of me but low enough to where his face is next to mine on the pillow. He doesn’t say anything else, just watches me and reaches up to grip my free hand within his, entwining our fingers together. I close my eyes, inhaling and exhaling to stop myself from being so damn weepy.
When I’m finally calm, I ask, “Do you think there are others like me?”
“I have no idea.”
