Cugel made a final inspection and at last called down the alarm: “Varmous! Rock-goblins on the hillside! Grave danger! Halt the caravan and sound the horn!”
Varmous pulled up his carriage and returned the hail. “What do you see? Where is the danger?”
Cugel waved his arms and pointed. “On that high bluff I see mountain goblins! They are piling rocks to tumble down upon the caravan!”
Varmous craned his neck and looked where Cugel had pointed. “I can see nothing.”
“They are gray, like the rocks! They sidle askew and run crouching this way and that!”
Varmous rose in his seat and gave emergency signals to his teamsters. He pulled the ship down to the road. “We will give them a great surprise,” he told Cugel, and called to the passengers. “Alight, if you please! I intend to attack the goblins from the air.”
Varmous brought ten men armed with arrow-guns and fire-darts aboard the Avventura. He tied the mooring-line to a strong farlock. “Now, Cugel, let the rope extend so that we rise above the bluff and we will send down our compliments from above.”
Cugel obeyed the order; the ship with its complement of armed men rose high into the air and drifted over the bluff.
Varmous stood in the bow. “Now: to the exact site of the ambush.”
Cugel pointed. “Precisely there, in that tumble of rocks!”
Varmous inspected the hillside. “At the moment I see no goblins.”
Cugel scanned the bluff with care, but the goblins had disappeared. “All to the good! They saw our preparations and abandoned their plans.”
Varmous gave a surly grunt. “Are you certain of your facts? You are sure that you saw rock goblins?”
“Of course! I am not given to hysterics.”
“Perhaps you were deceived by shadows among the rocks.”
“Absolutely not! I saw them as clearly as I see you!”
Varmous looked at Cugel with thoughtful blue eyes. “Do not feel that I am chiding you. You apprehended danger and, quite properly, cried out the alarm, though apparently in error. I will not belabor the matter, except to point out that this lack of judiciousness wastes valuable time.”
Cugel could find no answer to the imputations. Varmous went to the gunwale and called down to the driver of the lead carriage. “Bring the caravan forward and past the bluff! We will mount guard to ensure absolute security.”
The caravan moved past the bluff without untoward circumstance, whereupon the Avventura was lowered so that the ‘premier’ passengers might re-embark.
Varmous took Cugel aside. “Your work is beyond reproach; still, I have decided to augment the watch. Shilko, whom you see yonder, is a man of seasoned judgment. He will stand by your side, and each will validate the findings of the other. Shilko, step over here, if you please. You and Cugel must now work in tandem.”
“That will be my pleasure,” said Shilko, a round-faced stocky man with sand-colored hair and a fringe of curling whiskers. “I look forward to the association.”
Cugel glumly took him aboard the ship, and, as the caravan moved ahead, the two went forward to the bow and took up their posts. Shilko, a man of affable volubility, spoke of everything imaginable in definitive detail. Cugel’s responses were curt, which puzzled Shilko. In an aggrieved voice he explained: “When I am engaged in this kind of work, I like a bit of conversation to while away the time. Otherwise it is a bore to stand here looking out at nothing in particular. After a while, one begins to observe mental figments and regard them as reality.” He winked and grinned. “Eh, Cugel?”
Cugel thought Shilko’s joke in poor taste and looked away.
“Ah well,” said Shilko. “So goes the world.”
At noon, Shilko went off to the mess-hall to take his lunch. He over-indulged himself both in food and wine, so that during the afternoon he became drowsy. He surveyed the landscape and told Cugel: “There is nothing out there but a lizard or two: this is my considered judgment, and now I propose to take a short nap. If you see anything, be sure to arouse me.” He crawled into Cugel’s tent and made himself comfortable, and Cugel was left to think bitter thoughts of his lost terces and discarded boot-dressing.
When the caravan halted for the night, Cugel went directly to Varmous. He cited the frivolous conduct of the mimes and complained of the losses he had suffered.
Varmous listened with a mild but somewhat detached interest. “Surely Doctor Lalanke intends a settlement?”
“This is the point at issue! He disclaims responsibility in part and in sum! He declares that you, as master of the caravan, must discharge all damages.”
Varmous, whose attention had been wandering, became instantly alert. “He called on me to pay the losses?”
“Exactly so. I now present to you this bill of accounting.”
Varmous folded his arms and took a quick step backward. “Doctor Lalanke’s thinking is inept.”
Cugel indignantly shook the accounting under Varmous’ nose. “Are you telling me that you refuse to settle this obligation?”
“It has nothing to do with me! The deed occurred aboard your vessel the Avventura.”
Cugel again thrust the bill upon Varmous. “Then at least you must serve this accounting upon Doctor Lalanke and levy the payment.”
Varmous pulled at his chin. “That is not the correct procedure. You are master of the Avventura. Hence, in your official capacity, you must summon Doctor Lalanke to a hearing and there levy whatever charges you think proper.”
Cugel looked dubiously toward Doctor Lalanke, where he stood in conversation with Clissum. “I suggest that we approach Doctor Lalanke together, and join our mutual authorities the better to compel justice.”
Varmous backed away another step. “Do not involve me! I am only Varmous the wagoneer, who rolls innocently along the ground.”
Cugel proposed further arguments, but Varmous put on a face of crafty obstinacy and would not be moved. Cugel finally went to a table where he drank wine and stared glumly into the fire.
The evening passed slowly. A somber mood oppressed the entire camp; tonight there were neither recitations, songs nor jokes, and the company sat around the fire, conversing in desultory undertones. An unspoken question occupied all minds: “Who will be the next to disappear?”
The fire burned low, and the company reluctantly went off to their beds, with many a glance over their shoulders and an exchange of nervous comments.
So the night passed. The star Achernar moved up the eastern quadrant and declined into the west. The farlocks grunted and snuffled as they slept. Far out on the waste a blue light flickered into existence for a few seconds, then died and was seen no more. The rim of the east flushed first purple, then the red of dark blood. After several vain attempts, the sun broke free of the horizon and floated into the sky.
With the rebuilding of the fire the caravan came to life. Breakfast was set out; farlocks were brought to their traces and preparations were made for departure.
Aboard the Avventura the passengers made their appearance. Each in turn looked from face to face as if half-expecting another disappearance. Porraig the steward served breakfast to all hands, and carried a tray to the aft cabin. He knocked. “Madame Nissifer, I have brought your breakfast. We are worried as to your health.”
“I am well,” came the whisper. “I wish nothing. You may go away.”
After breakfast Cugel took Doctor Lalanke aside. “I have taken counsel with Varmous,” said Cugel. “He assures me that, as master of the Avventura, I may make a demand on you for damages suffered as a result of your negligence. Here is the bill of account. You must pay over this sum at once.”
Doctor Lalanke gave the bill a brief inspection. His black eyebrows peaked even higher than ever. “This item: amazing! ‘Boot dressing, one pot. Value: one thousand terces.’ Are you serious?”
“Naturally! The boot dressing contained a rare wax.”
Doctor Lalanke returned the bill. “You must present this bill to the persons at fault: namely, Sush, Skasja and Rlys.”
“What good will that do?”
Doctor Lalanke shrugged. “I could not hazard a guess. Still, I disassociate myself from the entire affair.” He bowed and strolled off to join Clissum, in whom he found qualities compatible with his own.
