Still looking at Mark’s battered old mobile mechanic van, Alex couldn’t help wondering why a man who advertised fixing other people’s cars had problems with his own. Was Mark a mechanic who couldn’t actually fix cars? That puzzled him. ‘Yeah, I’ll give you a hand. Let me find that spade and I’ll give you a shout later. It will get me from under the women’s feet. That bloody Zumba class is driving me bonkers, even Phyllis and Pauline turn up early to join in, then they all turn purple and sweat. I thought it would be all young birds with everything in the right places, but, God no. It’s all wobbly bits flying in every direction and none of them know their left from their right, and that includes your wife!’ Alex grinned.
Mark burst out laughing. ‘It wasn’t Olivia’s brain I married her for, it was definitely her tits!’ Mark winked and laughed. ‘She knows left is the side she wears her watch on, but if she ever takes it off, she is well and truly stuffed!’
‘How’s Mark? I saw you talking to him,’ Maggie asked as Alex arrived back at the pub.
‘Old Percy has a hole he needs digging; I’m going to give him a hand. I’ve seen an old spade in that shed, it will keep me out of mischief.’
‘Have you seen that bloody dog of his?’ laughed Maggie. ‘It’s got three legs, cancer tumours all over its stomach and it sounds like it has a smoker’s cough. Emma said he’s refused to have the dog put down, but I’m surprised it’s still standing. And to make it worse, it’s called Skippy!’ Maggie had tears running down her face she was laughing so much.
Frowning, Alex looked at her. ‘I didn’t know he had a dog; I’ve never seen him walking it.’ Alex’s curiosity was well and truly piqued. ‘I’m going to get the spade now; this is something I really have to see.’
‘Mark! I’ve found that spade. Do you want to do it now? It shouldn’t take long. What’s he planting?’
‘Yeah, why not? While it’s daylight.’ Leaving the bonnet of his van up, Mark rubbed his hands on a cloth that was more oil stained than his hands.
Walking around the back of Percy’s garden, Alex grimaced. It was a total mess. He had old sofas and washing machines piled high. The grass wasn’t cut and he had planks of old wood scattered everywhere.
‘Where the hell are we going to find a place to dig a hole in this scrap yard? His front garden looks tidier.’
‘Percy! Get your arse out here. Where do you want this hole?’ Mark shouted.
Coming out of his back door into the garden, Percy sported an old grey vest and tracksuit bottoms which looked like they had belonged to someone else, while holding a mug of tea.
Grimacing at the sight, Alex glanced towards Mark. ‘Hasn’t he ever heard of soap and water? And seeing those wrinkly man boobs under his vest makes me want to run home.’
‘Yeah, well, it gets worse in the height of the summer, believe me,’ Mark laughed.
‘I need the hole at the back there.’ Percy pointed to the side of some old washing machines stacked against the fence. ‘It has to be deep though.’
Sighing, Mark and Alex walked over to the appointed area and started digging. After a while, Alex stopped and rubbed his back. ‘What are you putting in this hole anyway, Percy?’
‘Yeah,’ Mark butted in, ‘what is it? An old oak tree or something?’ Puzzled by Percy’s furtiveness, they both waited until he went indoors and came out holding a long, thick parcel wrapped in black bin liners. ‘It’s my dog.’
‘What?’ exclaimed Mark. ‘You’ve had us both dig a hole for your dog? What is this, the bloody pet cemetery? You can’t go burying dogs in your garden; isn’t it illegal these days? What about when you die, and the next tenants come in and decide to sort this garden out and end up digging up its carcass?’
‘Never thought of that, but it needs doing.’ Percy lit his roll-up, which was perched safely on his bottom lip as always.
Flabbergasted, Alex mopped his brow. ‘Why don’t you ask the vet to take it away? They’ll sort it properly.’
‘This is its home.’ Percy laid the dog in the hole they had both dug. ‘I think it needs to be a bit deeper,’ he muttered.
Mark shook his head in disbelief. ‘Well, we’ve started Alex, we might as well finish. Though God knows what anyone else moving in here is going to think.’
Both of them were amazed at Percy’s nonchalance as he waited for them to dig a deeper hole. ‘Maybe that’s the only way they’re going to get the garden cleared. If they report it to the police, they will dig up the garden!’ he laughed.
‘I’ve got my court case coming up soon, so it was best old Skippy died,’ said Percy out of the blue.
‘Court case? For what?’
‘Had a bit of trouble with the law. I could end up back inside prison.’ Poker faced, Percy stared at them both.
‘What kind of trouble?’ Alex cast a furtive glance towards Mark, who shrugged his shoulders.
‘My friend in prison asked me to throw some mobile phones over the wall and I did. But I didn’t realise they had them CCTV cameras outside and they saw me.’
Amazed, Alex and Mark looked at each other and then back at Percy, their jaws almost dropping at this confession.
‘Did you kill your dog in case you go back in prison?’ Alex asked. When Percy nodded, he shook his head. ‘You old bastard. The vet would have done it for nothing, you know.’
‘I know, but this is its home. No one would foster it or take it in because it’s old and has cancer. They wouldn’t be able to find it a new home. This is for the best.’ Percy took a sip of his tea, while Alex and Mark stood there amazed. They couldn’t believe their ears.
Alex was just about to throw his spade down and walk away, when Magda, the young Polish woman from next door, popped her head over the fence and waved a piece of paper in their direction. ‘Mark, Mark come here.’ She beckoned.
Alex had long realised that anyone with a problem seemed to go to Mark; he was like the godfather of the street.
Walking over, Mark took the piece of paper out of Magda’s hand and read it. ‘It’s an electricity bill, what of it?’ Mark scoffed and passed it to Alex for inspection.
‘Have you seen how much they want to charge me for three months?’ Magda almost shouted, in a state of panic. Both Alex and Mark looked at the sum owed and let out a loud whistle. ‘Three thousand pounds. What the hell! Blackpool illuminations doesn’t cost that much, I’ll bet. You need to get on to the electricity company. They have obviously made a mistake.’
Tears rolled down her face in despair. ‘Will you ring them for me? My English isn’t so good. Help me Mark, please,’ she begged.
Glancing up, Alex saw Percy blush slightly, and his gut instinct told him he had something to do with it, or he knew something about it.
Mark took out his mobile and after a lengthy conversation, the electricity company informed him that the amount was correct, but they would send someone around to check the meter. Satisfied with another good deed done, Mark smiled. ‘Sorted Magda, it’s probably three hundred, don’t panic. They are coming tomorrow.’ Relief washed over her, and she couldn’t thank Mark enough, which built his ego even more. ‘Christ, no wonder I never get any work done around here. I’m like the Samaritans,’ muttered Mark.
Alex picked up his spade again and turned back to Percy. ‘And you, you weird old bastard, can sort your dog out yourself, I’m having nothing more to do with it. Come on Mark, we’ve earnt a drink.’
Alex felt Percy had deeper dimensions than just being the old man across the street. Instinct told him that things were not right, and his instincts had usually been right in the past. That was what had saved him and made him dodge a bullet in his past life.
Walking into the pub, Alex shouted, ‘Maggie, whether it’s opening time or not, we’re having two pints and a smoke out the back. What a bloody morning.’
‘Well, don’t think about bringing those muddy trainers in here; this carpet’s just been hoovered,’ Phyllis remarked and folded her arms defiantly. Like two naughty schoolboys, they took their shoes off while Phyllis poured their drinks.
‘Where’s Maggie?’ Looking around, Alex couldn’t see her, and usually on hearing his voice she appeared.
‘She’s got visitors out the back. Brewery I think.’
Curious, Alex excused himself from Mark. ‘I’ll just pop to see if she needs me.’
Alex stopped dead as he entered the room; it wasn’t the brewery but the police inspectors he had spoken to the other day.
‘Hello Alex,’ one said. ‘Just thought we’d pop in to see how things were.’
Alex rubbed his hands together and smiled, hoping they hadn’t mentioned the murder of the family they had previously spoken about. ‘Everything’s fine here. Just been doing some gardening.’
