“Let’s go.” I grabbed her hand and led her through the crowd. There was something going on in her head, making her act strange, and I was desperate to get to the bottom of it. That entire interaction at the table was the most bizarre dealing I’d ever witnessed with Hannah, and I needed to get some answers.
“My car—” She pointed to the lot out back of the restaurant where she had parked it, but I just shook my head and pulled her toward my bike on the street.
I took her bag and cinched it up, before sliding it into the saddlebag that held her gear.
“Knox.” She tried one more time, but I shook my head again, holding onto the anxiety inside of me by a thread.
I wrapped my hand around the back of her neck and pulled her forward, flush with the front of my chest, and bent down to press my forehead against hers. “I don’t know what just happened back there, but there are two things I do know, Hannah.”
“What?” She whispered like she was almost afraid of my answer.
“One; I’m going to get to the bottom of it. And two, if I don’t feel your body wrapped around mine, even from just the back of my bike for now, I’m going to lose my mind while I try to figure out yours.” I kissed her roughly, pushing my tongue into her mouth and she welcomed it, surprising me when she bit it and whimpered against my lips. “Now get on my bike.”
“Okay.” She whispered as I threw my leg over the motorcycle and pulled the stand up, holding my hand out to help her on.
The moment her body pressed against mine and she wrapped her arms around my stomach, some of the unease settled in my gut.
“Hold on tight, baby.” I warned as I started the engine, revving it a few times to tell the surrounding cars I was pulling out, my turn or not be damned.
“Always.” She replied over the roar of the pipes and tightened her hold, sliding her fingers inside of the metal buckle of my belt, which was her favorite spot to hang on.
I moved us through the downtown traffic, splitting lanes and taking alleys until the congestion opened up and we hit the rural route leading us toward our house and with each minute that passed, leading us further from the city and closer to our slice of paradise, she settled and relaxed into me more and more.
As I drove through the winding blacktop driveway, the trees blocked the house, but I could see the glow of the porch lights before we broke through into the clearing. I drove the bike directly into the open garage bay and turned it off as my ears rang from the sudden silence. She slid off the back of the bike, grabbing her work stuff, but I took it from her hands and carried it for her as we left the garage, heading for the house.
She was silent.
Alarm bells rang in my head as my normally chatty girl held all of that chaos inside of her head instead of sharing it with me like usual.
Halfway up the steps of the front porch, Brody walked out of the screen door wearing a pair of low riding jeans and nothing else. “When did you get back?”
“Earlier.” I said, grabbing him for a quick hug as Hannah lingered at the top of the steps, still silent. “I ran into Hanny at T’s.” I glanced back at her, and she was wringing her hands together in front of her. As Brody noticed the tension between us, his demeanor changed, and I accused, “What the fuck happened while I was gone?”
He snapped his head to me with a scowl. “What do you mean?”
I leaned back against the porch post and crossed my arms, nodding to Hannah, whose eyes were wide as they flicked between the two of us.
“I mean, did you know our girl was on a date with a centerfold model, who had enough big dick energy to put you in your place like a good little boy?”
“I wasn’t—” Hannah started and then wilted a bit when Brody turned her way.
“You said you were going to dinner with the tattoo artist.”
“Lex.” I interjected for him and raised my brows at him. “Big, big dick lesbian energy wrapped up in a shiny leggy package.”
“Will you stop it?” Hannah cried, looking at me with a look on her face I’d never seen aimed my way before.
Brody, sure. But not me, and her hurt look and teary eyes cut me deep.
“Hannah—” I froze, feeling like I’d landed in some twilight zone since returning home. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t know!” She yelled as those tears fell over her lashes. “But don’t you dare stand there and insinuate I was doing anything improper in the middle of the damn restaurant because I wasn’t!” She ended in a scream.
“Then what were you doing?” Brody asked calmly, which was odd.
Hello, twilight zone.
“I don’t know!” She shook her head as her bottom lip quivered.
“But it wasn’t platonic. Not completely, was it?” A rage I didn’t recognize built inside of me as I finally understood what I was seeing at the bar, and I recognized the fear in her eyes.
“I—” She hesitated and swallowed. “I think I’m bisexual.”
The entire world stopped spinning and everything around us drifted away as gravity no longer grounded us. “You’re what?” Brody scowled, shaking his head.
“For a few months now I’ve wondered,” She closed her eyes in pain. “I think meeting Lex confirmed it.”
I walked away from her as panic burned in my heart.
You’re not enough for me anymore.
I want something different.
This isn’t working.
I imagined hearing her say one of those things next, putting the nail in the coffin of the only life I’d ever wanted; her and Brody.
“I’m sorry.” She cried, but I couldn’t stop. Seeing the hurt in her eyes, my world flipped and I couldn’t stand it. “Knox! Please don’t leave.” I could hear the tears in her voice and my feet stopped moving as my need to comfort her battled with my need to digest what she just said. “Please don’t leave me.” She sobbed. “I won’t do anything. Ever. I just wanted to understand what my mind and body were mis-communicating. I’ll just turn it off. I’ll figure out how to make it stop, please. I’m so sorry!”
