‘It’s not all your fault,’ she replied as he took her hand.
‘But she was right—I’m his father. I wasn’t paying close enough attention to him.’
Ana sighed deeply, and to his shock she gently pulled her hand away from him. In the background he caught Bruno loading some supplies into the ambulance, watching them carefully, pretending he wasn’t. ‘I’m sorry, Gabriel.’
The look on her face sent his pulse to his throat. Sorry? ‘Why are you sorry?’
She shook her head, her expression flashing with pain for just a second. ‘Ana?’
‘I have to go,’ she said, her voice strained now.
‘Can’t we talk?’
‘What about, Gabriel? This isn’t going to work. There’s just too much going on with you and Ines, and Javi, and you don’t need me complicating things further.’
Dread coiled in his stomach at her words. ‘How are you complicating things?’
She inhaled sharply. Sadness and regret flared around her irises as their eyes locked. ‘I haven’t been paying attention either, Gabriel, and we’ve both been distracted and preoccupied lately. We’ve both forgotten what really matters. I think we should just go back to being friends, don’t you? I know you have a shift at the clinic tomorrow, but I’ll ask Ebony to come in.’
The words felt like a punch to his chest, not what he wanted to hear at all. He stood taller, feeling his composure start to wane the more he searched her eyes for a hint that she didn’t mean it. But she was clearly deadly serious. How long had she been feeling this way? Suddenly he could tell she’d been having these reservations for a while—he’d just been too stubborn to admit it to himself. Ana didn’t need all this drama in her busy life, and this was her polite way of excusing herself from a difficult situation before she became even more tangled up in it all.
‘I don’t think I can go back to just being your friend,’ he admitted with a frown. It was the truth. ‘But don’t bother Ebony. I won’t let the clinic down.’
‘I’m sorry,’ she said again. Before he could so much as take her hand, or tell her how much he regretted dragging her so deeply into this mess, she turned away from him and sped her chair towards the exit faster than he’d ever be able to keep up.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
ANA HAD ALWAYS prided herself on her ability to stay focused in the face of chaos. But there was something about the way Gabriel’s eyes met hers across the brightly lit examination room that threatened to shatter her composure. The tension that had been simmering between them all morning was still there, humming beneath the surface, and now it crackled in the air as they prepared to discuss expat Evelyn Sinclair’s case.
‘Mrs Sinclair, thank you for coming in today,’ Gabriel began, placing the medical chart down on the bed, his voice steady and reassuring. It was the opposite to how he’d been yesterday, when he’d been wracked with despair over the missing Javi, and then consumed with guilt and dread in the face of his ex’s fury.
‘Can you tell us about your symptoms—when they started and how they’ve progressed?’
The room was filled with the soft hum of medical equipment and the faint scent of antiseptic mingled with Gabriel’s fresh, familiar scent as Evelyn started recounting her fatigue and her achy limbs. Ana made notes, but her mind kept drifting as she tried not to look at Gabriel. He’d been so cool with her since she’d called things off. He hadn’t even tried to talk to her about it, almost as if he knew they’d be better off as friends. Maybe he’d change his mind about not wanting to be friends, she thought hopefully, though it didn’t feel right to her either any more. How on earth could they put something so wonderful into reverse so quickly?
They would just have to try.
She had slept with his scent surrounding her in bed last night despite the absence of him. Clutching the pillow he’d last slept on, she had let the tears fall, agonising over what she’d done. She had to let him go, though. She was doing the right thing, wasn’t she? Surely he realised she was simply getting in the way? Javi was everything to him, and now, after the incident in the park, Gabriel was probably even more terrified that Ines was going to go for full custody. He had always been Ana’s rock, had always been there to support her, even when she’d insisted he and everyone else leave her alone. It was only fair that she release him now and let him focus fully on his son.
Evelyn’s voice wavered as she continued, looking at Gabriel. ‘It started about six months ago. First the tiredness, no matter how much rest I got. My muscles felt so weak, and my skin...it became so sensitive that even the slightest touch was painful. My hair started falling out and my nails turned brittle. I’ve lost weight, despite eating more than usual, and I have trouble sleeping.’
‘That’s quite the list,’ Ana said, catching Gabriel’s eye.
‘Not being able to sleep is the worst,’ Gabriel said directly to Ana. OK, so that was a dig. She had clearly kept him from sleeping, as much as her abrupt decision to end things had kept her from nodding off until well after three a.m.
‘The last clinic I went to didn’t know what was wrong with me,’ Evelyn continued. ‘Lately, I’ve been having trouble swallowing, and my voice is hoarser than it should be. Can you hear it?’
Ana nodded. ‘Have you experienced any mood changes or emotional symptoms?’ she asked.
Evelyn hesitated, her eyes dropping to her lap. ‘Yes, I’ve been feeling depressed and anxious. It’s been hard to concentrate and remember things. I just haven’t felt like myself lately.’
‘I know what you mean,’ Ana muttered under her breath as she made for the store cabinet, letting Gabriel explain that they would have to run some tests, including blood work and imaging. It was getting near on impossible to ignore the way her own emotions were fraying around him, but the clinic came first, as did her reputation. She was not about to let a brief love affair ruin anything for her, any more than she was willing to complicate things for Gabriel and Javi.
Ana was still fighting her own wavering emotions by the time they were alone again. It was just herself and Gabriel, analysing tests, discussing symptoms and reviewing Evelyn’s case, while the big fat elephant still stood unaddressed in the middle of the room.
Gabriel sat on the examination table, staring at her over the edge of a medical chart. Her pulse quickened when their eyes met but she kept her voice calm. ‘It appears that Evelyn has an auto-immune disorder that’s attacking her thyroid,’ she said. ‘We’ll put together the treatment plan, starting with...’
‘This is so weird,’ Gabriel said suddenly, slamming the file on the bed and gripping the edge of it. His dark eyes bore into her as she felt the sweat prickle on the back of her neck ‘Don’t you think it’s weird? I’m not sure, now I’m actually here, that I can work with you any more, Ana. This should be my last day.’
His words felt like a gut punch. She sucked in a breath as he jumped from the bed, slowly spinning her chair round to him. ‘I thought we could at least try and be friends, Gabriel...’
‘I told you, that’s not going to work for me,’ he said curtly, and for a moment, the tension between them felt too strong to be contained. She thought he was about to grab her face, kiss her doubts away and remind her that they could and should never be platonic again, but his emotions stayed behind his eyes before he strode to the window and heaved a sigh at the glass.
‘Well, Ebony’s told me she can probably start coming in full-time,’ she offered matter-of-factly, afraid that she was about to follow him and demand he kiss her, and that she’d been wrong to call things off.
Don’t be weak, Ana, this is what you wanted! Didn’t he see how this was best for him and for them? Somehow, though, the words wouldn’t leave her mouth.
‘Right, then,’ he said, unbuttoning his coat while she felt the panic rise in her throat. ‘If Ebony’s free, that would be best.’
Ugh. He was being so cool now, it was sending an icy blast through her bloodstream, chilling her to the bone. She’d come to want him here at the clinic, she realised, overcome by her own selfishness suddenly as he stared out of the window with his back turned. To think she’d always thought she was the strong one, the independent warrior ploughing onwards, over anyone in her path. Now, the thought of him not being here any more, not being anywhere in her day-to-day existence, was really sinking in.
Later, at home, Ana sat in silence, prodding at a plate of pasta spirals. Her appetite was non-existent; all she kept thinking was how she would ever be able to go about her working day at the clinic without Gabriel, and without knowing she’d see Javi at the end of it.
What was wrong with Javi, anyway? It seemed as though he was increasingly frustrated about having to be at home with his mum and stepdad. The way Ines was reacting to the smallest things... OK, some of the bigger things too—the broken arm wasn’t exactly a mother’s dream, but it all spoke volumes about the other woman’s unhappiness.
Her doctor’s instincts were on alert. It was very clear when someone was stressed, and Ines was definitely highly stressed. Her mood swings were giving poor Gabriel whiplash. But it wasn’t Ana’s place to do anything about it.
The next day, Ana was eating lunch alone in the clinic’s small staff room, watching the rain falling outside. Naturally she was thinking about Gabriel and Ines. She could hardly believe it when a cough behind her drew her attention back to the door, and there was the woman herself. Spinning round, she almost dropped her salad into her lap. ‘Ines?’
