“Wow, that’s a huge weight off my shoulders,” said Avery. “Thank you, Bon Bon. I’ve been trying to work out when I could go. But you sure you’re okay being there alone after everything that happened?”
Bonnie tilted back her head to look up at the dappled light falling through the tree above her. All around her the city was making its usual complaint of car horns and sirens. On a playground out of sight, children shrieked and cheered.
“It didn’t feel right to not say goodbye. And…I’m thinking of starting training again,” she said. “It’s time.”
As soon as the words came out of her mouth, she knew they were true. She had no idea how Pavel would feel seeing her, nor how she would feel seeing him. She only knew that she had to find out.
“Oh, that’s brilliant!” exclaimed Avery. “I can’t believe it. What made you change your mind?”
There was no way Bonnie was going to tell Avery about the incident at the bar. At best it would only worry her, at worst she would take it as evidence of Bonnie’s need for therapy or professional intervention.
“It was our conversation, actually. Yeah, you really made me see how being a bouncer wasn’t, you know, serving me.”
Anyone who thinks boxers aren’t smart are fools. Fighters understand lying better than anyone. What else is a feint? A hook off the jab? A combination switch-up? Boxers are trained to telegraph one thing and do another.
“This is what I’m talking about!” declared Avery triumphantly. “I am a helpful person. I just want the best for you, for all my family. I wish I could get Lucky on the phone to hear exactly what you just said.”
“Why? What are you two arguing about now?”
Like most families, their sibling alliances shifted constantly, but ultimately, they remained split by age. Bonnie and Avery had remained on one side of the door, Lucky and Nicky on the other. But there were other, subtler bonds too. Bonnie knew that Avery and Nicky could talk for hours about books, for instance. Meanwhile, Bonnie’s natural reticence offered space for Lucky’s shy nature to unfurl. And Bonnie had her own bond with Nicky. After all, Nicky was the first person to ever see her box, had accompanied her to all her early training sessions. It was Avery and Lucky, the eldest and youngest, who had struggled to connect.
“I’m really worried about her, Bonnie.”
“What happened?”
Avery launched into a graphic description of finding Lucky crumpled on her top step.
“She was covered in glitter, with lipstick all over her cheek and neck, basically naked except for a pair of angel wings and this dirty feather boa she’d tied around herself.”
Bonnie smiled in spite of herself. She knew it was wrong, but she admired Lucky’s commitment to partying, which was nothing if not consistent. She thought it all sounded pretty glamorous.
“She’s twenty-six. She’s just a bit of a wild child. You really think it’s that bad?”
Avery practically barked with frustration.
“She’d traveled all the way home by herself like that. Like some wounded animal just waiting to be picked off from the herd. It’s a miracle she wasn’t raped.”
Bonnie shuddered at the word.
“Look, you have to remember Lucky’s been by herself in foreign cities since she was fifteen. She’s savvier than you give her credit for.”
She was trying to convince herself as much as Avery. Bonnie would never forgive herself if something bad happened to either of her remaining sisters.
“You didn’t see her,” said Avery. “She kept slipping in and out of consciousness, going limp in my arms. It was terrifying. I didn’t know what to do. I felt so useless.”
“You’re the opposite of useless,” said Bonnie gently. “What happened?”
“Well, I stuck her in a cold shower and basically slapped her back to consciousness. Not totally unsatisfying, I must admit.”
Bonnie exhaled a soft laugh. She couldn’t think of anyone better prepared to violently deliver someone back to reality than Avery.
“Then I managed to get her to drink a can of Coke,” Avery continued. “I read if she’d taken MDMA or anything like that the sugar would help her come down. Anyway, she’s been sleeping all day.”
“Probably for the best.”
Avery’s voice dropped to a low murmur.
“When I was holding her, I kept thinking about Nicky. I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you, Bonnie.”
Bonnie tried to respond, but she couldn’t. That moment, the moment when Nicky died, was beyond language for her.
“Look, I’ve gotta get to the gym,” she said. “But I’m glad you told me. You want me to call her?”
“No. Yes. Maybe. I don’t know. Let me see how she is when she wakes up. I’m sure she’d rather hear from you. You’ve always had a softer touch, ironically.”
Bonnie hung up and tried not to remember. But it was impossible. She sat on the bench as the city rushed around her and thought of Nicky. They had spoken on the phone in the morning; Bonnie was coming in from her training camp in New Jersey for the evening to see her. As soon as she let herself into the apartment, she could feel something was wrong. The air was too still. Then she saw her through the doorway of the bedroom, her dark hair partially covering her face. She looked like something that had just spilled, like a vase of violets tipped over.
It took her less than five seconds to cover the distance from the door to Nicky. When she crouched over her body, she noticed Nicky’s fingernails and lips were a pale shade of blue. She must have called 911, though she had no recollection of doing so afterward. The next thing she knew the operator’s voice was asking for the apartment number, but Bonnie couldn’t remember it. She had to rush back outside and check the iron numbers nailed to the door. My sister has had an accident, is what she said. She did not think she was dead.
Bonnie didn’t want the paramedics to waste a single second getting to them, so she picked up Nicky and staggered with her to the elevator. This would have been hard for most people, but Bonnie was strong. She was the strongest of anyone in the family. She held her sister tight to her chest as the elevator groaned down fourteen flights, then carried her into the lobby. The doorman shot up from behind the desk when he saw them. His mouth was a small, helpless “o.” Then the paramedics rushed in and ripped Nicky out of her arms. Bonnie could hear them saying something about her being unresponsive, about not being able to find a pulse.
What’s her name?
Nicky. Nicole. Nicole Blue.
How old is Nicole?
Twenty-six. Wait! Twenty-seven. She just turned twenty-seven.
