Adam couldn't refute her. He loved Laurel and William, and he could never walk away from them.
Elisa forced a smile. “Ah, but it is life, and for that I am grateful.”
Adam left her there and went to the bow of the vessel where he joined two crewmen watching for mines. Using a light, they slowly scanned the waves.
One of the men shouted and pointed, and the boat quickly changed course. Adam thought he'd seen a shadow in the water. His stomach tightened. They weren't home yet.
They moved on, twice more barely avoiding disaster. Finally they motored into deeper waters. The hum of engines grew louder, and they picked up speed. The wind turned cold, and rain splashed the boat and its passengers.
Morning cast a soft light on the English shoreline as the fishing vessel chugged into a small harbor. Elisa stood beside Adam with Adin between them. “We will begin our new life, and it will be a good one. I have promised Adin.” Her chin trembled. “Maybe we'll see each other again if I come to America.”
“Maybe,” Adam said, but they both knew it would never happen. “I won't forget you.” He wanted to hold her, but he knew it was time to return to the real world, to put fantasies behind him. A deep ache burrowing inside, he searched Elisa's dark eyes. “You saved my life. I won't forget.”
“And you saved mine.” Her eyes brimming, Elisa turned toward the approaching pier.
Chapter 21
UNABLE TO KEEP FROM SMILING, LAUREL GRIPPED THE STEERING WHEEL AS she bumped down her mother's driveway. Braking, she turned off the engine and threw the truck into first gear. “Mama,” she said, hurrying toward the back porch. “Mama!”
Jean stepped onto the porch, wearing a troubled expression. “What is it?”
Laurel flew into her mother's arms. “It's Adam! He's alive! They found him!”
Jean embraced her daughter. “Praise God!”
Stepping back, Laurel wiped away tears. “He's safe and on his way home! I've been laughing and crying all the way here.” She clasped her mother's hands. “I thought he was alive, but I was afraid…” She couldn't hold back the tears and returned to her mother's arms. “I've been so afraid.”
When Laurel's weeping turned to sniffles, Jean held her daughter away from her and smiled. “Come inside. Mattie's here.”
Mattie stood beside the table, her expression unreadable. “I heard your wonderful news,” she said. “I'm happy for you.”
Laurel remembered Luke. He was still missing. She walked to Mattie and took her friend's hands. “We'll hear from Luke too.”
Mattie managed a smile and hugged Laurel. “I keep praying and hoping I'll get word. Maybe soon, huh?”
Jean closed the door and said confidently, “That son of mine isn't one to give up. He'll be home.” She crossed to the stove. “Laurel, how about some coffee or tea?”
“No, thank you. I've got things to do. Adam's on his way. He'll be here this week!”
“We'll have a celebration. I'll fix a supper he won't soon forget,” Jean said. “Is that all right?”
“Yes, of course. He'd like that. I can't wait for him to see William. He's grown so much.” Laurel walked to the kitchen window and looked out. “I'm glad the cold weather didn't stay. I hope the warm temperatures hold.”
Adam watched the countryside slip by as the train neared Palmer. He'd expected cold and snow, but the ground was bare and the temperature relatively warm, almost balmy for Alaska. He glanced at his watch. Thirty minutes more.
He thought of Laurel, and his heart hurried. He couldn't wait to hold her. He wondered what William was like. It had been nearly a year since he'd set off, thinking he could change the world. The only thing that had changed was him. He couldn't identify exactly what was different, but he knew his time in Europe had stolen something from him.
Just that morning, when he'd stood in front of the mirror, he'd been able to see the physical changes—he looked tired and thin. But there was something more—on the inside. He was different. Laurel would notice. His mind wandered to his wife and he couldn't keep from smiling. He imagined her standing in sunlight, her auburn hair shimmering, hazel eyes clear and intelligent. His love for her welled up, then guilt quickly followed. How could he have betrayed her?
Adam's mind then returned to France and Elisa. Conflicted, his heart warmed and cringed all at the same time. He cared deeply for her, but what he'd done was wrong. Guilt and shame engulfed him. He hadn't really loved Elisa. He'd admired her and needed her, but he'd not loved her. There'd never been anyone for him except Laurel. He'd let them both down.
He'd allowed his feelings of isolation and anxiety to rule him. Elisa—vibrant and brave—had drawn him like a magnet. He squeezed his right hand into a fist and gripped it with his left. Lord, I'm sorry. Forgive me.
How could he put what had happened behind him? Laurel will know. She'll see it. Adam closed his eyes. Father, help me forget. I don't want to hurt her. A quiet voice spoke to him. “It was your decision, and now it is yours to make right.”
Adam knew he would have to face up to what he'd done. He'd have to tell Laurel. But how?
He tried to justify his actions. It wasn't that much. We didn't really do anything. His heart knew the truth and wouldn't release him from his shame.
The train slowed as it pulled into Palmer Station. Adam gazed out the window, searching for his family. He saw Jean first. She stood with Ray and the children on the platform. Then his eyes found Laurel. All thoughts flew from his mind except that he loved and needed her. She spotted him, and her face brightened, reminding Adam of a daisy in the morning sun. Laurel waved and ran alongside his window.
Love surged through Adam. “Laurel,” he called, then grabbed his bag and moved out of his seat and down the aisle to the exit. The train was still moving when he descended the steps and stood on the departure landing. Unable to wait, he tossed his bag to the ground and jumped, then ran to Laurel.
Catching her into his arms, he said over and over, “Laurel. Laurel.” They clung to each other. Adam buried his face in her hair. She smelled of lavender and soap. “Oh, I missed you. I missed you.”
Holding her face in his hands, he looked at her. “I thought I'd never see you again. I love you.” Oblivious to onlookers, Adam kissed her.
Someone patted his pant leg. “Adam,” came a small voice.
