‘We could negotiate every single term and make sure that didn’t happen. I wouldn’t sign anything without making sure of that.’
He was shaking his head in disbelief. ‘It sounds like you’re pretty sure what you want.’
I reached out for his hand but he pulled it away. ‘I’m not sure. That’s the whole point. We need some money right now, and a merger this big doesn’t come around very often. They like what we’re doing enough to pay a lot of money for it. Do you think I want to do business with that man? No. But we may need to.’
‘I’m aware. I was in the same meeting as you. I just value integrity over money, personally.’
Joe opened his mouth but I shot him a pleading look: ‘Don’t’. Yes, it was a low blow, but I couldn’t argue that it wasn’t justified. I was throwing a huge, unexpected spanner in the works. Level was Rory’s favourite thing in the world.
‘I just feel like a fraud. I don’t want to con people into thinking Level will change their lives. Not when I don’t think it will.’
Rory scoffed. ‘Just because it didn’t work for you doesn’t mean it won’t work for anyone else. It worked for Maeve. Maybe you’re just not meant to find your person that way.’
Maeve immediately held up her hands. ‘Don’t drag me into this.’
He glanced at her, incredulous. ‘I cannot be the only one who thinks this is utter madness.’
She softened, seeing the hurt in his expression. It killed me that I couldn’t be the one to move closer and fix it. I was in too far now, I had to see it through.
‘It’s a shock.’ Maeve turned her attention to me, clearly trying to read my mind. I’d let my fear of their affair stop me from telling her the truth too. Now my two best friends in the world were looking at me like they didn’t recognise me.
‘You might feel differently in the morning, when we’ve all slept.’ She silently pleaded with me, willing me to take it back. But once something like this was out in the open, you couldn’t shove it back under the rug.
‘I won’t.’ I traced my fingers in the condensation on the side of my water glass. ‘I won’t feel differently.’
Rory stood. ‘I’ve heard enough, I think. I’m going to bed.’
‘Rory.’ Now I was the one pleading. He looked at me the way he’d always looked at me, like we were the only people in the room. But this time there was no affection behind it. ‘Please can we go somewhere to talk about this?’
His eye contact didn’t waver, and for a millisecond I thought he might cave. But then his expression shut down. ‘I don’t want to talk about this any more. I’m going to bed.’
He walked off, shaking his head as he headed into the bedroom Maeve and I were sharing, slamming the door behind him. Everyone else at the table was quiet. Clearly, I was taking the couch tonight.
Maeve threw her head back. ‘Well, that was unexpected.’ She grabbed the leftover wine, moving to the fridge to put it away. ‘I wish you’d told me how you were feeling.’
I did too. She walked towards our bedroom, glancing at me.
‘It’s okay. Go.’
She nodded. ‘And just for complete clarity, I will not be having sex with him.’
Isla snorted, welcoming the icebreaker. Joe looked utterly confused. I watched as she opened the door, murmuring softly to Rory.
Isla came around to my side of the table, enveloping me in a hug. ‘Well, better that that’s out in the open, right?’
‘I’m not so sure.’ I stared at the closed bedroom door. The distance between us felt wider than ever.
36
‘I am so, so sorry about that, Isla.’ I slumped on Mum’s sofa, defeated.
It was a good job that we’d had to vacate the lodge before nine this morning; any longer cooped up in there with all the tension and I might have combusted. Rory hadn’t spoken to me since last night, the only communication an accidental moment of eye contact in the wing mirror. He’d dropped us all off at our flat, and Maeve had headed straight to a yoga class. The remaining three of us had come to Mum’s, Joe and Isla clearly gunning for a debrief.
‘That definitely wasn’t the finale to your hen do that I had planned.’
Isla handed me a cup of tea – something herbal (in other words, gross). ‘Oh, would you shut up?’
I blinked.
‘That was the perfect weekend. I wore a bikini, drank pink cocktails, and didn’t break my ankle on a hike. It’s the holy trinity. If I’m worried about anything, it’s next weekend.’
Joe came in and handed me another mug, switching out the herbal with a normal breakfast tea. I sent him a thankful look as he spoke.
‘Rory will probably be over it by then.’
I wasn’t convinced.
‘And even if he isn’t, Rory has taken the best man thing way too seriously to let anything ruin it. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s organised a flash mob.’ Isla shuddered.
I made a mental note to check that he hadn’t actually organised one, then remembered we weren’t exactly speaking all over again. ‘This is so shit. I need Rory, and I need to fix this, but we’re at a standstill. We fundamentally don’t agree. I can’t endorse a project I don’t believe in, but I don’t want to lose my best friend either.’
I sniffled, the weekend’s events catching up with me. Now that the cat was out of the bag, I felt more strongly than ever. I couldn’t work on the app if it stayed the same, and Rory didn’t want it to change.
‘Oh, Penny.’ Isla moved closer, hugging me. ‘You’ll work it out.’
And it wasn’t even just Rory. It was work, and it was Isaac, and it was Daniel. It was Mum thinking that she hadn’t been a good role model, and me not being able to think of a single anecdote for my speech. I hiccupped.
‘Why did I have to go and talk to Daniel fucking Grayson?’ A tear dripped into my tea. ‘Or Michael Daniel Broadhurst, whoever the fuck he is. And why did I have to get drunk at that stupid corporate mixer?’
