“Oh,” I said, embarrassed that I had, again, assumed the worst.
He shrugged. “It’s fine,” he said, though I hadn’t actually apologized.
We strolled in silence for a moment until we reached the edge of the woods. The trees cast shade over the ground, and as we continued on, the gentle breeze invigorated my blood, which had felt like it had gone stagnant from being trapped inside the castle for the last few weeks. My mind dwelled on what he had said. Something about his tone had made me wonder…
“Are they true? The rumors?” My words echoed off the forest canopy, and Evander didn’t look at me for a moment. My face went hot, and I was grateful for the songbirds who filled the space left agape from my inappropriate question.
“Which rumors?” he finally asked, that smug grin plastered across his face. But nothing about his green eyes glinted. How many years had he spent perfecting that mask, only to miss the most telling part?
Eyes did not lie, and there was no tricking them into it.
“The ones about your reputation.”
He stepped in front me of, stopping me in place as he leaned in close, much too close, tilting his head so that his lips lingered just above my forehead, a blade’s width away from brushing my skin. “Why do you ask?”
My blood went hot as my heart pounded. His breath was warm and soft on my face as he inched closer.
I cleared my throat and stepped back. “Stop trying to deflect.”
The seductive look drained clean from his face. Only annoyance was left over. He stepped back and placed his hands in his pockets. He started walking backward, and I followed him, refusing to let him avoid answering me that easily.
“If you mean the rumors that I take a different female to bed every evening, then no.”
Heat flushed my face as my throat tightened in discomfort.
“Embarrassed?” An almost mean-spirited smile spread across his face. I swallowed. I didn’t like that look on him. The way his perfect features formed into a sneer looked too terrifying. Too real.
I straightened my back. “Yes, actually. But I thought I’d risk the embarrassment to give you a chance to talk about it.”
Confusion softened his stare. “Why would you think I wanted to talk about it?”
“I don’t know. Maybe because I just figured I wouldn’t like it much if my sexual history was being gossiped about by people who didn’t even know me.”
“Do you even have a sexual history?” he asked, his lips forming into a sneer yet again. But instant regret twitched at the edge of his smirk, and he frowned. “I apologize. That was unkind.”
But I was prepared for it this time.
“No, but I’d rather people not talk about that, either. And I’d especially not like them making up rumors.”
He shrugged and turned, walking further into the woods. I followed him as we cut through the brush. The forest was beautiful. Pine needles brushed my cheeks as we walked, and there was an impressive lack of thorns in the bushes. Ivy clothed the thick tree trunks, and when I imitated Evander, who grazed the trees with his outstretched fingertips, I found the surface to be as soft and inviting as a homespun quilt.
After a long silence, he spoke. “There’s probably more truth to it than simply gossip, though people do like to exaggerate.” He turned to look at me, and his shoulders sloped as he sighed. “There’s something about realizing that you’re immortal. As a child, you think it’s a blessing. But when your mind finally works out its own thoughts, you start to realize there’s a weight to eternity. That, even though the possibilities seem endless, there’s not really a potential for limitless pleasure. Eventually, I’m going to run out of the things that bring me enjoyment. That’s the thing about thrills—they have a tendency to grow dull so very quickly. But pain, El? There’s an infinite amount of pain to be suffered.”
My heart sank, and I wondered if he was thinking of his brother.
As if reading my thoughts, he said, “I don’t know if it was as bad for my brother. He had a purpose, at least. Something to work for, people entrusted to him. I always thought it was an illusion—that his life had meaning—but I was jealous of it all the same. So, for a long while, I drowned the pointlessness and the emptiness with the parties and the so-called friends and the countless females.”
“For a while?” I asked. Were the rumors no longer true? They had sure seemed true, the way Evander talked to me that night he first came to visit my room. In fact, he had actively worked to perpetuate that persona.
“After Jerad died, I threw myself into that life more than I ever had. There’s something about it that’s numbing. And it was nice to be numb for a while. But then.” He looked at me, clenched his teeth, and swallowed. “But then, one day, it wasn’t so nice anymore.”
I nodded, mostly because I didn’t know what to say. The silence surrounding us went thick, which was probably why I asked, “And Blaise?”
Evander frowned. “What about her?”
I chewed my lip. “The two of you seem close.”
Evander practically gagged. “I’ve known Blaise since she was a toddler. She’s like my sister. An even better one than my actual sister.”
The way his tone soured when he spoke of Olwen, his sister who was rumored to now reside in a tower crafted of vines after refusing to go forth with the marriage arrangements King Marken had prepared for her, I didn’t think it best to pursue the subject. The papers made it seem like Evander and Olwen had never gotten along, and the way his jaw clenched at the thought of her, I was inclined to think the articles weren’t simply hearsay.
“I figured,” I said, returning the conversation back to Blaise, “but you never know.”
Evander crinkled his nose as if I’d presented him a rotten spud. He cleared his throat. “Do you have someone back home? Someone you love?”
The question startled me, especially since I hadn’t expected the conversation to turn so quickly to me. Not after what the prince had just confessed.
“Um, no.”
“Are you telling me the truth?”
“Yes, why wouldn’t I?”
“So you’ve never had anybody? Loved anybody?” he asked. “No rugged window-installation man you had your eyes on? Anyone like that?”
“No,” I said, laughing. “My father installs all the windows. Besides, I’ve been too busy with my glassmaking. I love it. And, well…” I paused, not sure that I was ready to reveal the next bit.
He cocked his head to the side. “What?”
