“Yes. I worry that I would have,” he says again. “And I can’t bear the thought of it.”
“Oh, Tyson,” I say.
He hesitates, then tells me about an argument they had a couple of days before she died. Summer had been upset that Tyson and I had gone to the mall without asking her to join us. She’d even gone so far as to ask Tyson if he’d ever kissed me.
I look at him, shocked. It doesn’t sound like Summer at all.
“You told her no, right?”
“Of course I did. But the whole thing just confused me. It made me feel like we shouldn’t have crossed that line. I regretted kissing her. At the same time, I wanted to kiss her again…. Either way, I was scared that I was going to mess up not only my relationship with her but the friendship of all four of us.”
“That didn’t happen, though,” I say.
“I know that,” he says, nodding. “But, Hannah, don’t you see?”
“See what?”
“What did happen was way worse.”
“Meaning you’ll never know what could have been?” I ask him.
Tyson gives me an incredulous look, then shakes his head. “Meaning she died, Hannah. I mean, who the fuck cares what would have happened between the two of us? Even if we’d had an ugly breakup—and it blew up our friendship—she’d still be here. I was worried about the wrong things.”
I lower my eyes and nod.
Chapter 18
Lainey
That evening, Hannah and I are in the bathroom, primping for dinner, when my agent texts. She says she’s about to call, and I need to pick up—it’s important.
The phone rings one second later. I answer it on speakerphone, so I can finish contouring my cheeks with a bronzing stick.
“Are you sitting down?” she asks me.
Hannah and I exchange a look in the mirror.
I freeze, then yell at her. “That’s a terrible question, Casey! This better be good news.”
“It is. It’s fantastic news.”
I breathe a sigh of relief and resume my contouring. “You’re lucky,” I say. “What’s going on?”
“You remember the big audition you just blew off?”
It’s clearly a rhetorical question considering the amount of shit she gave me for the decision.
“Vaguely,” I say as Hannah winces.
“Well, it turns out that your little hard-to-get maneuver worked. Because…” Casey pauses, keeping me in suspense. “They. Want. You.”
“They want me for what? Sales Associate Number 2?”
“No, Lainey. They want you for the lead! They want you to play the Pigeon Girl.”
Hannah gasps, then covers her mouth with both hands.
“Is that so?” I say, waiting for the catch.
“Yes. I just got off the phone with Brad.”
“Pitt?” Hannah whisper-shouts.
I shake my head.
“Lainey?” Casey says. “Did you hear me? You’re Brad’s first choice!”
Hannah grabs my forearm, gripping it tightly in excitement.
“Ow,” I say, pulling away from her.
“Lainey? Are you there?”
“Hmm. Yes. I’m here,” I say. “So who else passed on it?”
“Nobody. They asked you first.”
“Wow. That’s incredible,” I deadpan, then whistle. “They wanted me over Margot Robbie?”
“Margot Robbie is way too pretty for this role.”
“Why, thank you.” I smile.
“You know what I mean, Lainey. This character is not a blond bombshell. She’s a quirky brunette. You read the script, didn’t you?”
“Yeah,” I say, though it was more of a quick skim than a read. I had been planning to do a deep dive on my flight to L.A. But then Hannah called.
“So if you actually read it, you should realize that Margot Robbie isn’t right for this role—”
“What about Issa Rae? Rose Byrne? Kristen Bell? Anna Kendrick? America Ferrara?” I rattle off. All comedic actors. All bigger names than I am.
“They’re too old to play this role. At thirty-two, you’re on the cusp of being too old yourself.”
“Again. Thank you.” I laugh.
“Hey. No point in sugarcoating it.”
“What about Emma Stone? We’re around the same age.”
