I pressed my finger to her lips until she opened her eyes. I took care to keep my voice low. “Then I would say I love you, too. A love I could never feel toward Jack or anyone—though I love him in a special way, too. You’re my best friend.”
She exhaled and kissed my fingertip. “I didn’t know how to say it, but yes. I understand.” Still, she didn’t move away. And I didn’t force her to. When her calloused hand touched my cheek, I didn’t turn away. Instead, I turned into her touch and kissed her palm. “Bon—”
Her body was pressed against mine in an instant, and her free arm circled around my waist. “I love it when you say my name, Red.” Her breath was warm on my throat. I closed my eyes. “Say it again.”
Her fingers traced their way from my cheek to the back of my neck before twirling into my hair. She gave a slow pull that pulled my head back and exposed my throat. “Say it.”
The word whisped from my lips in a throaty whisper. “Bonnie.”
Bon growled as her lips met the skin of my neck. I expected her to be rough—but she wasn’t. Her lips were soft and her kisses ravenous.
“Bonnie,” I moaned as she pulled my hair harder. “Oh Bonnie.”
“Let me make love to you, Redella.” The arm that circled behind me was, at once, hiking up my heavy dress. I tried to ignore the want that stirred in my most secret places as her fingers gripped the inside of my thigh. “Let me show you how much I love you.”
Jack’s face, so freshly rescued, burst to the forefront of my mind. Red, what are you doing?!
With both hands, I pushed her away, my breath coming in awkward gasps. The warmth on my neck from Bon’s lips cooled with her sudden absence. I fought my tied tongue for words and tried to ignore the look of want—and hurt—in her violet eyes. Bon’s shirt was half unbuttoned, revealing her voluminous, dark-tipped breasts, which no matter how masculine she chose to dress, would forever reveal she was all woman.
I reached out across the sudden expanse between us and grabbed the sides of her shirt. I smiled into her face and pulled her close. My skin brushed her exposed breast and she shivered. I placed my hand over her thundering heart.
“I love you, Red.” Bon’s voice was heavy. “I fell in love with you the minute I saw you.” Something hitched in her chest, I felt it and heard it. “But you love Jack.”
“I do love Jack.” I erased the space between us and pressed my lips to hers. Her mouth worked against mine hungrily, but I pulled away. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings for you. Strong feelings.”
“I don’t want to leave without you.”
“I can’t leave Jack, Bon. He’s my husband.” I forced a smile. “And you risked everything to bring me back to him.”
I let my hand slowly fall from over hear heart, down her chest. “I’m indebted to you, beautiful Bonnie.”
Bon sucked in a deep breath, her breasts swelling into my hand. “If I wasn’t married to Jack, I would leave with you in an instant.”
Her violet gaze met mine.
“But I have to remain faithful to my husband.”
“I’m a madame on a whoring ship. Faithful isn’t really in my line of work.” She looked away. “I suppose I can understand your wanting to stay faithful to Jack. If you were mine, I’d want you all to myself, too.”
“However—” I caught her fingers in mine and brought them to my lips. “I can be intimate with you in another way.”
Bon scoffed. “Is there another way?”
I held her hand in mine and stared into her eyes. “Bonnie?”
She smiled and arched her brows. “Red?”
“I’m going to share something with you that nobody knows. Not Jack, not anybody. I’m not even sure of it myself, really.”
She flexed her fingers in mine. “Go on?”
I took her hand and placed it on my stomach. We stared at each other for what seemed to be the longest while.
“I don’t have any proof, really. But I think—”
“Lord above!” Bon tore her hand from mine and let out a whoop. “We’re havin’ a baby!” She danced a little jig. “Ain’t never been in that predicament myself.”
A wide smile pushed up the corner of my lips. “Neither have I.”
“If I was still a good practicing Catholic, by God, I’d say make me the godmother!”
I wrinkled my brow and tried to picture Bon in one of those ornate Catholic churches of my childhood. I shook my head and pitied he priest that would hear her confession.
“Reckon I can still be godmother anyway? I mean, I could teach the little tot to climb ratlines—”
I started to laugh.
Bon continued, working the buttons on her shirt. “To set the sails.”
I slapped my hand over my eyes.
“And of course, how to choose fresh girls—”
“Bon, really!” I let go a belly laugh. “I suppose we’ll have to see what Jack thinks—” The smile melted from my face and my laughter died on my lips. I froze as I tried to make out the crumpled shape across the hold.
“What’s the matter, Red?”
I squinted before the bile rose up hard and fast as the shape came into focus. I choked back the vomit. “Oh no—oh God, please no.”
