Simon
THE NIGHT SHE DIES
Friday 3rd May
Jess
Jess eyes the CCTV camera – the back of it, she’s not stupid – and wonders how long she should wait at the railway station car park. Jess was sure that Amber would appear from the trail that leads into it, but she hasn’t yet, and she’s also turned her map function off on Snapchat so Jess can’t track her.
The only other routes away from her meeting point with Lucy are back to the village – but that would mean her passing where Jess had been crouching – or heading up towards the Ridgeway, and she can’t believe Amber would go up to the woods in the pitch-black on her own. But she’s been waiting for over ten minutes now, and has sent like a thousand messages, and there’s still no sign.
She frowns. Did Amber definitely get away? It was completely still and silent up there, so Jess had assumed both girls had gone. But it was hard to see in the darkness.
And they had been fighting.
Did Lucy do something bad to Amber? Something bad enough for her to not be moving or speaking? But that wasn’t what she was threatening. She said she was going to tell everyone the truth. Which could mean she knows what Amber and Jess have done.
And on top of all that, there’s Sean, his weird, creepy message:
I see you.
Jess checks Snapchat again. But there’s no response from Amber, and with her map function switched off, Jess can’t tell if she’s chatting with Caden or Sean or anyone else.
Then a new thought glides forward. Sean is Amber’s friend, not hers. The two of them message all the time. So why has Sean messaged Jess tonight?
Is it because Amber is ghosting him too?
Amber never normally turns her map function off. Jess had assumed it was to do with her meet-up with Lucy, but could it really be about Sean? Is she hiding from him?
And if so, why? What does he know?
A jolt of anger rushes through Jess. Why does Amber always have to push her luck? Without ever considering the consequences? And why does it feel like Jess is the one who always gets burned for it?
She tries WhatsApp.
I’m out. Where are you?
The ticks stay grey.
Jess squints her eyes in concentration. However tough Amber comes across, if she knows Sean’s on to her about the money they’ve been skimming, she’ll be scared. Would she turn to Caden for help? Would she suddenly fancy him again if she needed protection from her dealer? Then Jess thinks about her message exchange with her ex, how he changed his mind about meeting up with her, and shudders with anger, grief, stupidity. She can’t believe she’s risked getting into more trouble with Molly and Bill for this. Shivering in a railway station car park with Sean on her case, and no idea where Amber is.
Her phone buzzes in her hand. And this time, it doesn’t stop. She squints at the line of numbers glowing on her screen; not someone in her contacts, but it might be Amber on the dumb phone. She lifts the handset to her ear. ‘Hello?’
‘Jess?’
Extra saliva forms in her mouth like it does when she’s about to be sick. ‘Yeah?’
‘Where the fuck is Amber?’
‘Uh, I dunno.’ But she needs more than that, a realistic excuse to calm Sean down. ‘I was grounded, so she went out without me.’
‘Don’t bullshit me! You’re by some train station.’
Jess swears silently. Why didn’t she follow Amber’s lead and turn her Snapchat map off? ‘Yeah, okay. I escaped, like twenty minutes a go, but I can’t find Amber either.’
Sean clicks his tongue. ‘Is she with that Caden guy?’
‘I swear, Sean, I don’t know.’
‘You expect me to believe that? You live in a village in the middle of nowhere. You’re hiding her, aren’t you,’ he accuses, his voice rising. There’s drill music in the background; it’s loud but scratchy, like the speakers can’t deal with the volume setting.
‘No, I promise,’ Jess says, not even trying to conceal her fear anymore. ‘Why would I hide her from you?’
‘Because she’s been skanking me, the bitch!’ His paranoia about privacy even on burner phones has clearly been side-lined by his fury. ‘Creaming a fiver off every gram. I can’t believe she’d do that to me.’ There’s a dull thwacking sound, like Sean hitting something inanimate, and Jess wonders where he is. Does he still live in his mum’s flat on the Leys estate or have the council kicked him out now? But suddenly there’s another background noise, a car horn hooting, and Jess realises he’s in his car. A Honda something, black with alloy wheels.
‘She never would, Sean,’ Jess tries. ‘Whoever told you that, they’re wrong.’ He goes quiet, but Jess finds the silence even more terrifying, so she prompts him. ‘Sean?’
He snorts bitter laughter. ‘You know, that’s what I thought,’ he says, the anger now replaced with an icy chill. ‘At first. Even when my mates warned me that she couldn’t be trusted. So I tested her, the last time we met, and I could tell something wasn’t right. She couldn’t look me in the eyes when I talked about upping the price – even though it was easy extra p’s, she didn’t want to know. So when she said she was going to hang around that party house tonight, I got a mate’s sister to pretend she was going to it, and buy some gear from Amber. Fucking fifteen quid, that’s what she charged.’
‘It’s only a fiver difference,’ Jess whispers, changing tack, but then falls silent. She needs to think of something better to say, find the words to get them out of trouble. But thinking and talking are two things that she’s not very good at under pressure.
‘It’s NOT only a fiver, though, is it?!’ Sean shouts, the anger and volume back. ‘It’s a trust that’s been broken. And after I gave her a second chance.’
‘To do what?’ Jess whispers, her voice warbling, but loyalty giving her just enough courage to speak out. ‘She acts like you’re some kind of god, and you just use her to sell your drugs.’
Why is she saying this? Winding him up? Would Amber do the same for her?
‘You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re the one who fucked up her life, not me,’ he hisses.
Jess’s eyes grow hot. Because he’s right, she did fail Amber. And whenever she thinks about it, she hates herself for it.
But maybe this is a way to make up for her mistake, to show her sister that she’s not chickenshit anymore. ‘You get the same amount of money from her deals, so why shouldn’t she make a bit more? She’s the one taking all the risks.’
‘Ha! Are you really that stupid?’
Jess closes her eyes. The energy, her fight, disintegrates. Of course she can’t win this. ‘I’ll get Amber to call you when I see her. But it’ll be tomorrow …’
‘Jesus, you are that stupid!’ he shouts, interrupting her. ‘Stop pretending you don’t know where she is! I’m on my way to Chinnor now. She’s told me about some parkland by a lake. Make sure she’s there in thirty minutes or I swear I’ll kill the fucking pair of you.’
The call cuts out and Jess’s hand shakes as she lowers her phone to her side. Her heart is beating like she’s sprinting the hundred metres, but her legs won’t move. She warned Amber against stealing from Sean, yes, but with how much force? And how genuinely? The truth is, she liked seeing Amber treat Sean like everyone else – like her – rather than being completely caught up in his spell.
And now they’re both going to pay for Amber’s deceit.
Except Amber doesn’t know Sean’s on his way.
Jess thinks again about the different routes Amber could have taken. And how there’s only one that really makes sense. Does Amber have the nerve to go up to the Ridgeway, through the woods, alone, in the dark? They both love it there in the daytime, and think of it as their safe place. If Caden’s with her, maybe it’s exactly where she’d want to be.
And there’s only one way to find out.
