‘You expect me to believe that? You live in a village in the middle of nowhere. You’re hiding her, aren’t you,’ he accuses, his voice rising. There’s drill music in the background; it’s loud but scratchy, like the speakers can’t deal with the volume setting.
‘No, I promise,’ Jess says, not even trying to conceal her fear anymore. ‘Why would I hide her from you?’
‘Because she’s been skanking me, the bitch!’ His paranoia about privacy even on burner phones has clearly been side-lined by his fury. ‘Creaming a fiver off every gram. I can’t believe she’d do that to me.’ There’s a dull thwacking sound, like Sean hitting something inanimate, and Jess wonders where he is. Does he still live in his mum’s flat on the Leys estate or have the council kicked him out now? But suddenly there’s another background noise, a car horn hooting, and Jess realises he’s in his car. A Honda something, black with alloy wheels.
‘She never would, Sean,’ Jess tries. ‘Whoever told you that, they’re wrong.’ He goes quiet, but Jess finds the silence even more terrifying, so she prompts him. ‘Sean?’
He snorts bitter laughter. ‘You know, that’s what I thought,’ he says, the anger now replaced with an icy chill. ‘At first. Even when my mates warned me that she couldn’t be trusted. So I tested her, the last time we met, and I could tell something wasn’t right. She couldn’t look me in the eyes when I talked about upping the price – even though it was easy extra p’s, she didn’t want to know. So when she said she was going to hang around that party house tonight, I got a mate’s sister to pretend she was going to it, and buy some gear from Amber. Fucking fifteen quid, that’s what she charged.’
‘It’s only a fiver difference,’ Jess whispers, changing tack, but then falls silent. She needs to think of something better to say, find the words to get them out of trouble. But thinking and talking are two things that she’s not very good at under pressure.
‘It’s NOT only a fiver, though, is it?!’ Sean shouts, the anger and volume back. ‘It’s a trust that’s been broken. And after I gave her a second chance.’
‘To do what?’ Jess whispers, her voice warbling, but loyalty giving her just enough courage to speak out. ‘She acts like you’re some kind of god, and you just use her to sell your drugs.’
Why is she saying this? Winding him up? Would Amber do the same for her?
‘You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re the one who fucked up her life, not me,’ he hisses.
Jess’s eyes grow hot. Because he’s right, she did fail Amber. And whenever she thinks about it, she hates herself for it.
But maybe this is a way to make up for her mistake, to show her sister that she’s not chickenshit anymore. ‘You get the same amount of money from her deals, so why shouldn’t she make a bit more? She’s the one taking all the risks.’
‘Ha! Are you really that stupid?’
Jess closes her eyes. The energy, her fight, disintegrates. Of course she can’t win this. ‘I’ll get Amber to call you when I see her. But it’ll be tomorrow …’
‘Jesus, you are that stupid!’ he shouts, interrupting her. ‘Stop pretending you don’t know where she is! I’m on my way to Chinnor now. She’s told me about some parkland by a lake. Make sure she’s there in thirty minutes or I swear I’ll kill the fucking pair of you.’
The call cuts out and Jess’s hand shakes as she lowers her phone to her side. Her heart is beating like she’s sprinting the hundred metres, but her legs won’t move. She warned Amber against stealing from Sean, yes, but with how much force? And how genuinely? The truth is, she liked seeing Amber treat Sean like everyone else – like her – rather than being completely caught up in his spell.
And now they’re both going to pay for Amber’s deceit.
Except Amber doesn’t know Sean’s on his way.
Jess thinks again about the different routes Amber could have taken. And how there’s only one that really makes sense. Does Amber have the nerve to go up to the Ridgeway, through the woods, alone, in the dark? They both love it there in the daytime, and think of it as their safe place. If Caden’s with her, maybe it’s exactly where she’d want to be.
And there’s only one way to find out.
Jess turns towards the Ridgeway and sets off.
AFTER
Friday 10th May
Rachel
‘I still don’t think Milla should go,’ I say, but in a quiet voice and behind the closed kitchen door, in case she overhears and starts pulling me up on my feminism.
‘Me neither,’ Matt murmurs back. The room’s not warm, but sweat is trickling down his temples. ‘But it is true that she knows the off-road route better than either of us. And I trust her.’
‘I trust her too,’ I counter, hoping I don’t sound defensive. ‘I just don’t like the thought of her being in danger. Christ, her A levels start in a couple of weeks. Most parents would have their kids chained to the desk by now, and we’re letting ours do a ransom drop in the middle of the night. How has this happened?’ My eyes bubble with tears.
Matt sighs. ‘Life throws curveballs, Rachel. And there’s no point asking why, because you won’t get an answer. Do you know how many times I asked that question when that kid accused me of hitting him? I never worked it out, but I did get through it. Truth and fairness reigned in the end. You could say the same about this situation. It’s terrible right now, and tragic for Amber’s friends and family. But they’ve got a suspect in custody. And you never know, without anyone bullying her, Lucy might even start enjoying life again.’
I push my lips together. I still hate thinking that Lucy benefits from Amber dying, even though it’s true that she does. ‘None of that keeps Milla safe tonight,’ I remind him.
‘Well, I have an idea about that. I’m going to follow her.’
‘What?’ My volume rises a bit and Matt puts a finger to his lips.
‘After she leaves, I’ll go in the car. Park up on Chinnor Hill Road and walk down from there. I’ll keep out of sight, of course, but the trees will give me plenty of cover. And I’ll be close enough to help if Jess does do anything. Not that she will,’ he adds. ‘I’m sure she just wants the money. But it’s good to cover all eventualities.’
I open the fridge door and pull out a bottle of beer. I shouldn’t really drink at a time like this, not when I might need to make some quick decisions, but DI Finnemore’s visit has been rapping at my temples for hours now and I need something to relax me. ‘Want one?’
‘No thanks. Are there any Cokes in there?’
We sit down at the kitchen table and listen to the gentle fizzing as our drinks are exposed to the air. ‘Do you really think this will work?’ I ask. ‘That Jess will take her ten grand and that will be the end of it?’
Matt flicks at the ring pull on his can. ‘We’re doing what we can to make sure it is,’ he says grimly. ‘And she’s a 15-year-old girl who’s just lost the only member of her family. She’s not going to be thinking too clearly, is she?’
His incorrect assumption about Jess’s family tree makes me think about Colleen, and Jess’s father, and my earlier thought that perhaps she’ll go to him once she gets the money. God, I hope so. For her sake, and for ours.
The door swings open and I turn to look at Milla. She’s dressed all in black. Leggings, hoodie, socks, even her trainers. Her hair is neatly braided in a French plait and she’s wearing a serious expression. ‘It’s eleven forty,’ she says. ‘I’m leaving in a minute.’
‘You’ll need gloves,’ Matt says.
‘I have a pair in my bag.’
