“If you’d asked me a week ago, I’d have said it was nonsense,” I replied.

“And what about now?”

“I believe in fate,” I smirked.

XVII

THE STAR

AMELIA

My heart had stopped beating and hadn’t produced a single beat since I’d said Harry’s name. The shadowy figure of a man remained at the door in total silence as I edged towards him anxiously with my shaking hand outstretched.

“Please, don’t freak out,” the figure whispered softly.

“Take your hood off,” I said.

The man reached to his head, removed the hood slowly and turned to me. He had certainly been resurrected, but it wasn’t Harry.

“Steve?” Kim asked.

“Yes. Calm down, ladies, please. I can explain everything,” Steve said gently.

For a few moments, I thought it was all a deliberate lie. Even though I’d buried him, I somehow convinced myself that he could have walked through that door. Any feelings of hope or happiness were quickly overridden by bafflement and quiet anger. There was still a chance, though. Maybe he managed to fake the whole thing as a cunning plan to escape the Broadheads. He wouldn’t have been able to get in touch with me either. It would have put me in danger. Or maybe this whole thing was a tactical ploy he’d come up with to remove me from his life. It was the only way out for him, and he knew I wouldn’t let him go easily.

One thing was for certain: Steve wasn’t leaving this room until he had divulged all the secrets he had been harbouring. He had already got away with that once, and I wouldn’t let him disappear again until he spilt the beans and confessed every single thing he knew about Harry. If, by some divine miracle, Harry was still breathing, I would force Steve to take me to him. 

“We are calm, Steve. What the hell are you doing here?” I said impatiently.

“This is Harry’s flat. He gave me a key, so I’ve been staying here since my house went up in flames.”

“Have you seen him?”

“Who?”

“Harry!” I shouted.

“Am I missing something here?” Steve said to Kim in bewilderment.

“We thought Harry might have been living here, but it was obviously you,” Kim explained.

“Harry’s dead, love,” Steve said.

I wasn’t sure whether Steve was lying to cover for Harry or it was the actual truth. I knew what a rational person would believe, but I needed to be certain. I marched towards him and pinned him by his throat against the wall. I turned to look at Kim, who seemed absolutely petrified by what she’d just witnessed me do. For a second, I’d forgotten she was there because of the blind rage I felt. I tightened my grip and leaned into Steve’s face forcefully.

“Tell me everything. Right now,” I ordered before releasing my grip.

“Jesus, you only had to ask,” Steve panted.

“I did. I won’t be asking again.”

“The Broadheads burned my place down because I couldn’t pay them back. So, I’ve been lying low here,” Steve explained.

“The Broadheads told me they came after you because they couldn’t collect from Harry. They said you were his guarantor,”

“Harry thought he’d paid up. But I used half of his money to clear some of my own debt. According to them, he still owed them half,” Steve confessed.

I was still within reach of Steve, and he deserved to feel some pain for what he’d done. I took the opportunity to deliver a swift kick between his legs. He yelped and crashed to the floor like a sack of rocks. I intended to do some more damage, but Kim managed to stop me before I clocked him again. He was coughing convulsively in a pathetic bundle on the floor, and Kim, looking anxious to diffuse the violence, suggested I sit down. All these people who had wronged Harry behind his back were still pretending to care about what happened to him. I was the only one who really cared. Everyone else was flagrantly using him. If Kim wasn’t there, I would have been able to stop myself, but I wasn’t ready for her to see my true colours just yet.

“I deserved that, I reckon,” Steve said as he stood up and made his way over to the other sofa.

“You deserve more than that,” I threatened.

“Can we all just calm down, please,” Kim suggested.

“What were you going to tell me on the night of the fire?” I questioned abruptly.

“Are you sure you want to know?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“Well, considering this place, isn’t it obvious?”

“Enlighten me.”

“Harry was planning to leave you. He got this little love nest to escape to.”

Steve never liked me, and I did just deliver a kick to one of his favourite parts, but I could see in his eyes he was telling the truth. Even though I didn’t want to believe it, all my worst insecurities confirmed so. His use of the words ‘love nest’ is what really irked me. Was Harry bragging to Steve about what he was planning to do, and that’s how he ended up having a key? Who was this other woman he intended to live here with? Were they laughing at me behind my back? The questions continued to pelt me, and I could feel my old adversary anxiety bubbling away beneath the surface.

Whoever this other woman was, she couldn’t have been classy. You wouldn’t catch me dead roughing it in a place like this. He must have been willing to throw away our entire marriage for some common street whore; what does that say about how he felt about me? He wished to start a family with me. He wanted me to be the mother of his children. Was the whole thing just a cruel joke? To what end?

Breathe.

I was starting to get too worked up, and I could feel the inevitable attack coming. I couldn’t let Steve see me in that state, and I wasn’t done with him.

“Pass me my bag, Kim,” I asked.

Kim it over to me. I didn’t have to wait for the signs; I knew I was seconds away from another panic attack, and it was better to take them now rather than wait. I swallowed the tablets dry rather than touch a glass of water in this squat. Steve stood transfixed, staring at me while waiting for my response.

“Was there someone else?” I asked.

“Yes. But I don’t know who. He never said,” Steve replied.

I couldn’t tell if Steve was lying. There wasn’t much that Harry wouldn’t tell Steve, but I didn’t know him well enough to make an assessment. I stared at him for an uncomfortably long time, but his resolve remained unwaveringly.

“Are you James?” I asked.