“He did,” Junichi says, staring at me.

“Jun, are you staying?” Nino asks.

“Am I?” Junichi reiterates, his gaze like a laser beam on my face.

I’m not sure if he wants to or if I’m burdening him. This all feels tricky because I know very well how Jun feels about ranked vampires. He’s told me about them, and even a little about Ren—his purebred source that he practically loathes. Now, he’s saying I’m one. I don’t believe it, but I imagine him running away from me, screaming with his arms flailing, the first chance he gets.

I’m not selfish. I know how to be alone and how to take care of myself, but… it’s been a hard week and I’m not too keen on being left alone so soon. Not right now.

“Yes, please.”

“Good.” Junichi grins. “He still needs some convincing.”

Nino smiles. “Sure he does. It’s not like we just told him he’s a quarter German. He’s an entirely different species—like he was happily grazing around as a horse and now he’s a lion and needs to eat meat. It’s a big change.”

“You hear that, Jae?” Junichi smiles. “You’re a lion now. King of the jungle. Top of the food chain.”

I roll my eyes. I don’t feel very lion-like. I feel like an awkward human whose anxiety is being heightened by two vampires, and the fact that I’ve no-showed for work for several days… I feel like an unemployed doctor.

“Take care of yourself tonight, Jae,” Nino says. “See you both later.”

“Thank you, Nino,” I reiterate. “For everything, really. And I’m so sorry.”

“I’m your realm leader, and your friend. I’m happy to help you.” He nods at Jun, who in turn waves, before walking through the front door and shutting it behind him.

My realm leader? How awkward. I lean with my elbows on the table, rubbing my palms against my face. God help me.

“Are you ready to feed again?”

“No. I’m not drinking your blood, Jun. No offense, alright? I’d like a second opinion.”

“You already have.”

“Have what?”

“Drunk my blood, Jae. You already did.”

I drop my hands. “Well I’m not doing it again. Not until I see a human doctor.” Getting up from the table, I move toward my sofa because I’m getting sick of him staring at me like the cat who got the cream. Like he’s unequivocally right and I’m loony.

I plop down and continue rubbing my face. My hands and skin are still so damn chapped. Psoriasis? Shingles? I’m creeping closer to forty, and weird shit starts happening around now. Maybe tomorrow I’ll want a lover half my age or a sports car I can’t afford. Good God. I need to go to work tomorrow—my patients. What the hell has been happening with them? Can I work like this? I run my fingers up and through my hair, and it feels too long. I need a trim. Will I have time before my shift? Impossible. “Bloody hell.”

I collapse back into the sofa and take deep breaths. My world is literally falling apart, and I feel like complete shit. I lift my head and open my eyes because I can feel and smell Junichi directly in front of me, kneeling. I don’t mean for it to, but my question comes out as a whine. “What now?”

He doesn’t speak, but wraps his long fingers at the backs of my knees and pulls. The action makes me slide closer to him but further down into the bend of the sofa so that I’m slouching. I am not in the mood for this. He pulls my arms, urging me upright so that he’s beneath me as he rests on his knees between my thighs. When I’m sitting straight, he holds my cheek with the palm of his large hand as he stares up and into my face.

“Kiss me?”

I should not be kissing right now. Or even thinking about kissing. But he’s looking at me with his obsidian eyes and full lips. And I always want him, don’t I? He pulls me down toward his mouth and I let him. The moment we connect, I exhale. I love his mouth—so warm, clean and talented. Slow and rhythmic, like he’s dancing with it, leading me and pulling me into him. He licks deeper and I meet his effort, gently twisting our tongues together. Tasting each other.

He pulls away slightly, pressing his forehead into mine as he whispers, “Sunshine, you need to feed. You’ll feel better.”

“It sounds mental.”

“It isn’t.” He lifts his head just a little and sucks his bottom lip into his mouth. I’m confused at first, but then I see that he’s biting the inside of his lip and I draw back, gasping.

“Jun—”

“Will you try, please?” He’s staring at me with his pitch-black eyes as he leans in, but he stops. Waiting for me to meet him. To comply. I can see the blood pooling just inside as he parts his lips.

My throat is tight and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I lean in—just a quick touch of my lips to his. I pull back, hesitating and feeling utterly insane. I didn’t even taste anything. He cups my face between his hands and tilts his head, pressing our mouths together.

He urges me to part my lips, his tongue softly sliding into me as I open wider, and I taste him. His blood is just as it was before—fresh and woodsy. Inexplicable, like wintery forest air and lavender.

Instinctively, I close my eyes and give in to it, wanting more because it tastes so good. Not like blood at all. Not coppery or salty. It’s delicious in the heat of our mouths and I start chasing after it. He pulls me again and I slide off the sofa to straddle his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck—frantically wanting both him and the taste of him because it soothes me.

He breaks the kiss and my breath catches. My heart is going wild and I want everything from him. Anything. Something. He brings his hand up to his mouth. I watch as his fangs slowly appear, elongate as if by magic into thick, sharp white points. They’re honestly beautiful, and I’m mesmerized as he bites into the side of his palm. There are two pools of blood there when he’s done, threatening to drip and run down his flesh. My eyes are flickering between his irises and his palm.

“You need more,” he says, perfectly calm. The blood is running now because I’ve waited too long. Hesitating, I bring his hand to my mouth, all the while beside myself at what I’m actually about to do and how senseless it is. Psycho. Someone should lock me up and throw away the key immediately after.

I drag my tongue up the trail of liquid, cleaning until I reach the epicenter. The path tastes the same as the previous two times I’ve had him, so I wrap my lips around his bite marks. It’s so fulfilling, like having a whole basket of chips to yourself after stealing only one or two from your friend’s basket for the past ten minutes. I feel greedy and I have the nerve to suck, like I actually know what I’m doing. When the flow stops, I pull my head up, indignant. The holes have closed and healed over. I blink up at him. “Wh-why?”

He laughs, even though, as far as I can tell, nothing is funny. “You want more now?”

“No.” I shake my head, rubbing my palm down my face. “I… Jun, this is too much—”

He bumps me up with his hips, bringing me even closer into his body. “You can have more, if you tell me you want it.” He’s kissing my jawline, then up to my ear and down my neck. His hands are wrapped around my arse, holding me into him. He feels solid and secure, like he’s got me and I can trust him. Like… for once in a very long time, I’m not just on my own.

I inhale a deep breath, deciding to let myself lean on someone. To try, anyway. “I want it,” I tell him. “I… I do.”

Twenty-Four

Jae

In my mind, Haruka is a bit like the Pope. Except much younger and Japanese… beautiful and queer with a gorgeous, sun-kissed husband.

Alright then, maybe not like the Pope at all.

He is regal. Patient and kind. Something radiates from him, quiet and elegant, that tells me he’s on a different playing field. All ranked vampires have this, but Haruka with his burgundy eyes and cool demeanor makes me feel like I’m in the presence of a very old soul. A king. Someone totally unfit for my shabby flat. He’s sitting with me at the kitchen table. Junichi occupies the third seat.

“You have been a vampire since the day you were born, Jae,” Haruka explains, his mesmerizing eyes focused on me. “You were never truly human.”

He pauses. I have no idea what to say to that. “Alright…”

“Can you accept this?” he asks.

“Well…” I sit up straighter, rolling my shoulders. “I’ve been happily sipping Junichi’s blood for the past twenty-four hours, so I’m definitely not human like I thought. Humans don’t generally do that… If they do, they’re considered mental.”

“Correct.” Haruka nods. “Do you find yourself enjoying the experience?”