He sighed heavily and shook his head. Whether he was doing the right thing remained to be seen. Life needed to go on. Theodora would move on with her life, and then where would he be? Left in the house with no one but Thomas for company. The thought depressed him more than he would have liked to admit.
Livinia would move on to the next position when the time came. He’d contemplated asking her to stay on as housekeeper, but that would only present more problems in the future. The two of them couldn’t keep their eyes or even their hands off one another. He needed to do what was right for everyone; he only hoped that his decision wouldn’t lead to more problems.
“Would you like another cup of tea, My Lord?” Thomas asked quietly as he retrieved the empty cup and saucer. He stood in the middle of the room as if he’d appeared out of thin air.
When did he come into the room?
Benedict observed the man closely as he moved around the room without making a sound. “No, thank you, Thomas. I have an appointment soon. I don’t think I’ll be back until late this evening.”
“Very well, My Lord.” Thomas bowed respectfully and continued to tidy the room. His movements were fluid and silent, more stealthy than Benedict had realized.
He’d always been there, quietly serving in the background. Just how much did the man know? This was a question that Benedict had begun to ask himself since Livinia had made her accusations.
I saw them angrily whispering to one another in front of Lady Eleanor’s carriage.
Livinia had been adamant that something strange was happening between them. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to see Eleanor having anything more than a casual conversation with a servant. She was far too much of a lady for anything sinister to be taking place.
“Thomas, was there a problem last time Lady Eleanor was here?” He decided to test the waters, straightening in his chair. If Thomas were hiding something sinister, his behaviour would give him away. Benedict was sure of that more than anything else.
Thomas turned away from the papers he had been organizing on the desk. “A problem, My Lord?”
“Yes, I thought I saw you and Lady Eleanor arguing in front of her carriage when she left. Did something happen?” He bent the truth in an attempt to protect Livinia. He told himself that he wanted to protect the smooth running of the household. Animosity among servants was like poison in a drinking well.
A flash of what seemed like panic came across his face, but Thomas quickly recovered. “I’m afraid I did not check to see that the horses were properly cared for while Lady Eleanor was inside. Her Ladyship was angry and told me never to allow it to happen again, My Lord. I did not think to tell you of the conversation since it was my error.” He licked over his lips once he’d finished talking.
Benedict took a moment to observe, staring him down to see if he would crack. His story was plausible and fit in with Eleanor’s character, but that didn’t explain why Thomas would have been talking back to her. He was cheeky at times, especially to other staff members, yet he had always been respectful to those in a higher position.
“If I may venture a bold question, My Lord, will we be seeing more of Lady Eleanor?” Thomas’ words surprised Benedict; venturing a question like that was definitely out of character for him.
“I think we may. I haven’t quite made up my mind yet, but I will by this evening.” Benedict rubbed the tip of his finger and thumb together as he watched his servant’s reaction.
The stony look that came over his face gave little away as Thomas bowed and left the room. Was he pleased or disturbed by the answer? If it was a matter of disliking Eleanor, then the quarrel Livinia had referred to was understandable.
Livinia …
She floated back into his mind like an ever-present ray of light. He cared for her much more than he should for a woman who worked in his household. If she had been a lady, there would have been no question about their courtship, but the reality of his station in life held him back from acting on anything other. Keeping her at arm’s length and treating her as indifferently as any other staff member was his only option.
There was also the fact that whoever came into his life would need to live with the danger of his past. He didn’t want to place such a burden on Livinia’s shoulders. She would be far safer in a different household when the time came.
Eleanor was different; she could hold her own and had even been around during the time that his parents were murdered. Someone with Eleanor’s standing in Society wouldn’t need his protection. She would be able to spot a scheme from miles away. Livinia, however, was sweet, a little naïve when it came to life, and nosy.
She is also beautiful, caring, funny, and everything else I find desirable.
Both women were beautiful, but there was no question when it came to whom he needed to choose.
Placing his hands on the armrests of his chair, Benedict pushed himself up and stood. He’d reached a final decision on what needed to be done.
***
Livinia folded her arms over her chest and watched from the study window as Benedict rode through the mansion gates. They hadn’t said a word to one another in days since she’d gone to his room. She now feared for her position as well as her heart. She thought of him every waking moment and dreamed about him when she fell asleep.
Her chest clenched at the thought of leaving the mansion and having to work for someone else. She wondered for the hundredth time where he was going when he left the house from morning to night.
“Miss Campbell, do you think we will be starting a new lesson tomorrow?” Theodora asked timidly, drawing Livinia’s attention away from the window.
Turning with a forced smile, Livinia faced her charge. “Are you done with the history book?” She sighed heavily, causing her arms and chest to heave.
“I finished it yesterday. I hoped we might move on to something else soon?” She blushed a little as she glanced down at the book before her.
Theodora was beginning to show signs of becoming a fine young lady. She no longer referred to Livinia by her first name. She had even begun using her brother’s title while speaking of him. Livinia felt guilty for not having prepared a proper lesson. The truth was that she had been so preoccupied by what had happened with her and Benedict that she couldn’t focus.
“I know I haven’t been quite myself; I will prepare something new for tomorrow. Would you like to study the arts and try painting?” She walked over to the desk and pulled a piece of parchment forward.
“I would like that very much.” Theodora hesitated for a moment, pausing as she bit her lips.
“Is something the matter?” Livinia looked up before taking a seat.
The girl seemed uncertain, fidgeting with the edge of the book on the desk in front of her. “I was just wondering why you were so distracted. Benedict is never here anymore, and things seem to keep changing. I always wished for change, but now that it’s here, everything seems scary.”
Livinia took pity on her. Life could certainly be scary when change was out of one’s hands. Even she was terrified at present and didn’t know what the next day would bring. “What are you scared of?” she asked gently, wanting to gain the girl’s trust willingly instead of forcing the matter.
“I’m not certain; everyone just seems to be going along with all the changes. I know change can be good, but Benedict has been far broodier than usual. He sits in the parlour until late and hardly says a word to anyone. I haven’t seen him speaking to you other than good morning and good night.” She glanced up at Livinia with a questioning gaze.
What could she say to the girl? That she was just a servant, and that the earl had every right not to talk to her? They hadn’t exactly been on speaking terms before, but they had at least discussed the lessons and the day’s events. Livinia had gone as far as staying away from the parlour altogether to avoid the atmosphere.
“Do you think he’s going to marry Lady Eleanor?” Theodora’s blunt words sent a wave of shock through her body.
Is he seeing her when he leaves the mansion for hours on end?
