“Foggy,” he says in his airy accent, lifting his hand to rub it in the wild nest atop his head. “Tired.”
“You’ve been asleep for almost seven days.” I don’t know what else to say.
“Yeah.” He breathes this answer, smiling. Warm, peachy air puffs out of him, and my body is so sensitive to it that it sends tingles all through me. My nature is going wild and my spine is hot. I want to stand up and move away from him because it’s terrifying me. But I know I shouldn’t do that. I can’t. I feel so damn awkward I don’t know what to do with myself.
Now we’re just staring at each other in the white sunlight. I look away and inhale a breath, rolling my shoulders. How the hell is this possible?
“Can… Is it alright if I feed from you?” Jae asks, making me shift my gaze back to him. I used to think his chestnut eyes glowed. They didn’t before, but they absolutely do now. They’re radiant. He’s batting them at me, and I can’t tell if it’s on purpose or not. I swallow hard and whip my head around toward Haruka. I need one of them to say something, to explain this situation to me.
Haruka gently grabs Nino’s wrist. “We’ll give you two some privacy.” Nino follows his mate, but he’s looking at me with wide eyes. My eyes are wide too because they’re abandoning me. Leaving me alone with this confounding and alluring creature.
I literally watch them walk all the way out the room and slide the door closed, willing them to come back.
“Jun?”
I snap my head back around, blinking at him like I don’t know who he is. Do I know who this is? This male emanating regal energy: antiquated and noble, like he’s from another time and place. What happened to my feisty little doctor?
“What’s wrong?” Jae asks, his brow furrowed. Now I feel bad, so I swallow hard and roll my shoulders. I have to get my shit together. I have to do this.
“Nothing.” I smile. Try to act normal.
“Haruka said feeding might help with the fogginess I feel.”
“Sure. Of course… Did he say anything else?”
Jae puffs out another breath and it hits me smack in the face. I close my eyes to stifle my nature’s insane reaction to him. Insane. Like my body is on fire.
“He told me not to drain you.”
My eyes are still closed, but I can hear the smile in his voice. I rub my fingers against the bridge of my nose, breathing and focusing. “Probably shouldn’t kill anyone on your first day as a vampire.” Jae laughs at this, the sensation breathy and sparkly. I swear to God, if he doesn’t stop that…
“Christ, that sounds weird,” he says. I open my eyes, and as I thought, he has a little self-deprecating smile on his lips. “Do you… do you think I’ll be alright? Can I do this? How do I make my teeth come out? They’re pulsing and hurt a little. It’s weird.” He raises his upper lip, sliding his tongue across his retracted incisors to get a feel for them.
“You’ll be fine. And your teeth will know what to do even if you don’t. Aside from the fogginess, what else do you feel? Anything?”
He pauses, flickering his vivid honey-brown eyes down, then back up at me. I swear he’s doing this on purpose. “Honestly?”
“Yeah… what is it?”
“I want you,” he says, pushing the covers away from his lower half and making me shift back slightly. “I always want you, but…” He crawls toward me and I sit back further on the bed, taken aback, my chest tight. He closes the distance, smoothly lifting himself into my lap to straddle me.
“Your scent is so strong now—pristine.” Jae threads his fingers against the back of my head and into my hair, pressing his forehead into me. “I thought you smelled good before, but God… You’re like lavender and winter and cypress trees all rolled into one. My whole body feels wired with electricity. I didn’t feel like this until you walked in here, but it’s incredible.”
I’m frozen and not even touching him because I feel like I have an untamed animal in my lap. A beautiful and wild creature that doesn’t know its own strength. His energy isn’t radiating outward, but I can feel its power buzzing within him and pulling me in as he litters my face with kisses. The smell and heat of him are overwhelming my senses. “Jae.”
He stops, blinking. “Hm?”
“Can you slow down, please?” I take a deep breath, placing my hands on his hips.
He grins, flashing a playful smile. “Sorry. Is my breath terrible? It’s been seven days since I brushed my teeth—”
“No. You can feed. You have consent. Like Haruka said, don’t suck too hard, alright? And… please be careful about your thoughts. Try to control them. Don’t overwhelm me with the stuff in your head.” Shit, I’m nervous.
He nods, his gaze soft. Sincere. “Alright.”
I swallow and it goes down thick. “Go ahead.”
He’s still smiling as he leans down into my neck. He licks me. Then again and again, softly, like he’s getting a taste for me and also trying to decide where he wants to bite me. When he puts his mouth on me, I feel his fangs pressing against my skin. They break through gently, and then his tongue is lapping against me as he controls the liquid flowing into his mouth.
Everything he’s doing is so careful. Precise, like… well, a good doctor. After a moment, I feel his mind. The thoughts are radiant and soft. It reminds me of candlelight, the way it warmly swells and glows.
He loves me. Selflessly and truly. He’s excited about life and he wants me. He’s grateful to me. All of his thoughts, they’re too pure and sincere. Too honest. My eyes alight and I shut them tightly against the burn. My nature is overwhelming me again, as if it has a mind of its own, fiercely responding to Jae and everything he’s doing to me. I can’t stifle it. Can’t control it.
When he lifts his head, my body is trembling. Jae cups my face with his palms, so I open my still glowing eyes.
“Was it bad?” he asks quietly. “Why are you shaking? Your eyes are amethyst again… It’s so lovely.”
“I’m fine. You did great, Jae.”
“Yeah?” He leans in, brushing a kiss on my lips. He lingers with his mouth touching mine, wanting me to respond.
“Yeah,” I breathe, parting my lips for him. But he’s pushing and lapping into me too soon—holding me tighter. I squeeze his hips and pull my head back.
“Jae.”
“Mm?”
“Just—You need to eat. Actual food. And probably shower. Does your head feel better now? Less foggy?”
