Dina took off her coat before collapsing on top of my double bed and nestling back against my stack of colourful pillows and cushions. I gave her a quick once-over, trying to gauge whether her pregnancy had changed her appearance. She unwrapped her hijab and her brown hair tumbled out, a mess of curls around her face. As always, her freckled face was makeup-free. She was wearing a beige hoodie over ripped jeans that she had patched up herself from the inside, so as not to show any skin. I let out a breath. She looked exactly the same.
‘Well?’ I asked. ‘How was your scan? Tell me everything!’
Dina closed her eyes for a moment, a small smile dancing on her lips. ‘Maya, it was so beautiful. I was feeling really nervous about having another baby, especially when I’m just about coping with Sami, but seeing the baby in 3D has changed everything. I’m ready.’
‘Well? Is it a girl or a boy?’ I asked in excitement. ‘Is Sami getting a brother or a sister?’
‘Is it OK if we keep it a surprise? I feel so nervous about everything.’ Dina looked imploringly at me and I tried to swallow back the disappointment. She had told me it was a boy when she was pregnant with Sami. What was different now?
I didn’t ask. Instead, I told her that she was going to be an amazing mum to both children. As Dina continued talking about the baby and Sami and her in-laws and husband, I felt my heart grow tighter and tighter in my chest. I really was happy for her and there wasn’t an iota of jealousy in me.
I just wished my life was moving forward too.
Chapter Six
‘So? Have you read any more of the notebook?’ Lucy asked the second I got into the office on Monday, before I had the chance to take off my jacket or put my bag down.
‘No, but I’ve started doing the stuff on the list,’ I replied, settling into my seat and turning my computer on.
‘Already? That was quick!’
‘Only the first one. His first point is to do a physiotherapy course, which is obviously irrelevant to my life, but it got me thinking about what I could do to further my own career – or my knowledge at least.’
‘Interesting,’ Lucy mused. ‘I like where this is going. So what did you decide?’
As I scrolled through my emails and made a note of all the things Sheila wanted me to get on with that day, I told Lucy about the scholarship and master’s degree I wanted to do. Arjun rolled in at some point and – unlike Lucy, who was completely supportive of my plan – he thought I had lost the plot.
‘You want to go back to uni? Now? At this age? All for some guy you don’t know?’
‘It’s not for a guy, it’s for me. I’ve been inspired by him, that’s all,’ I corrected him, a tad sharply.
‘Hmm, if you say so,’ he said, sounding dubious. ‘Anyone want a microwaved masala chai?’
When I got home that evening, the first thing I did was read over my scholarship and university applications. I had emailed them to Dina the night before for her thoughts, but she hadn’t responded and the more I delayed it, the greater the chance of me changing my mind. I knew I could carry on editing a word here or there forever, but I needed to take ownership of what I’d done and then go for it and let fate, aka God, decide what would come of it. If the tingly sensation in my gut was anything to go by, then I had made the right choice. With a ‘Bismillah’ I hit send and then went downstairs to see if Ma needed any help.
‘I sent my application,’ I told her as she took the dish of steaming hot macaroni out from the oven, the cheese beautiful and golden with the sauce still bubbling underneath.
‘That was fast,’ she replied, setting the food down onto a heatproof mat at the table. ‘You really want to do this?’
‘Yup. I do.’
‘OK, well, Insha’allah khair. Whatever is in Allah’s plan will happen. Can you call your brother and dad to come down and eat?’
‘Sure. BABA! MALIK! COME DOWN AND EAT!’ I yelled.
Rolling her eyes, she muttered, ‘I could have done that my flippin’ self.’
My dad and brother came thundering down the stairs and soon we were all tucking into another one of Ma’s delicious dinners, as Baba filled us in on his day at work. I’ve been listening to stories about his colleagues since I was little and was totally invested in Gifty’s paranoia, Sandra’s marital dramas and Bernadette’s OCD tendencies.
‘I spoke to Mitu this morning,’ Baba suddenly told Ma, referring to his younger brother who lived in east London. ‘He’s already got someone he thinks would be a good match for Maya.’
I froze, my Buffalo chicken wing halfway towards my mouth, which became locked in a gaping position. I looked over at Malik, who was grinning like he had heard the funniest joke in the world. Ma shot me a nervous look and quickly rearranged her expression to look reassuring.
‘Oh?’ she said. ‘Do we have a biodata for him?’
‘Not yet,’ Baba replied, ploughing through his dinner like he wasn’t talking about something as life-changing as marrying me off to some dude I didn’t know. ‘Insha’allah he’ll send it through tonight.’
‘We’d better make one for Maya,’ Ma mused, talking about me as if I wasn’t sitting right there. ‘Let’s do that after dinner.’
‘Make what?’ I demanded when I finally got use of my mouth back. I knew I had agreed for them to start looking but still, this all seemed a bit quick for my liking. I had only just submitted my course application!
‘Your biodata,’ Ma said calmly.
Malik began to chuckle. ‘Better start prepping for an interview, sis.’
‘I don’t know why you’re laughing,’ Ma frowned at him. ‘While we’re at it, we might as well make one for you.’
‘What?’ he spluttered. ‘I’m not getting married!’
‘Ever?’ Ma and Baba both turned to glare at him and I breathed a sigh of relief that the spotlight was off me for now.
‘Not right now! I’m only twenty-five.’
‘So? You have a good job, plenty of money,’ Ma reasoned. ‘Unless your heart is elsewhere, of course. Is there something I need to know about?’
‘Yes, Malik,’ I narrowed my eyes at my brother who was beginning to look as though he wished he hadn’t opened his big mouth. ‘Has the viscount got his beady eyes on an unsuitable viscountess? There are rumours milling around in the ton, according to Lady Whistledown.’
