Oh, Adam. “Someone. I’m not sure.”
“Did you see their badges?”
“I . . . didn’t pay attention.”
“Were they on your panel?” There was something underneath his tone.
Something pressing that hinted at violence and rage and broken bones.
Adam’s hand was still gentle on her cheek, but his eyes narrowed. There was a new tension in his jaw, and Olive felt a shiver run down her spine.
“No,” she lied. “It doesn’t matter. It’s okay.”
His lips pressed into a straight line, his nostrils flared, so she added, “I don’t care what people think of me, anyway.” “Right,” he scoffed.
This Adam, right here, was the moody, irascible Adam who grads in her program complained about. Olive shouldn’t have been surprised to see him this angry, but he’d never been like this with her before.
“No, really, I don’t care what people say—”
“I know you don’t. But that’s the problem, isn’t it?” He stared at her, and he was so close. She could see how the yellows and greens mixed into the clear brown of his eyes. “It’s not what they say. It’s what you think. It’s that you think they’re right. Don’t you?”
Her mouth was full of cotton. “I . . .”
“Olive. You are a great scientist. And you will become an even better one.” The way he was looking at her, so earnest and serious—it was going to
break her. “Whatever this asshole said, it speaks nothing of you and a whole lot of them.” His fingers shifted on her skin to weave through the hair behind her ear. “Your work is brilliant.”
She didn’t even think it through. And even if she had, she probably couldn’t have stopped herself. She just leaned forward and hid her face in his neck, hugging him tight. A terrible idea, stupid and inappropriate, and Adam was surely going to push her away, any minute now, except that . . .
His palm slid to her nape, almost as if to press her into him, and Olive just stayed there for long minutes, crying warm tears into the flesh of his throat, feeling how grounding, how warm, how solid he was—under her fingers and in her life.
You just had to go and make me fall for you, she thought, blinking against his skin. You absolute ass.
He didn’t let her go. Not until she pulled back and wiped her cheeks again, feeling like maybe this time around she’d be able to hold it together. She sniffled, and he leaned over to grab a box of tissues from the TV table.
“I really am fine.” He
sighed.
“Okay, maybe . . . maybe I’m not fine right now, but I will be.” She accepted the tissue that he plucked for her and blew her nose. “I just need a while to . . .”
He studied her and nodded, his eyes unreadable again.
“Thank you. For what you said. For letting me snot all over your hotel room.”
He smiled. “Anytime.”
“And your jacket, too. Are you . . . Are you going to the department social?” she asked, dreading the moment she would have to get out of this chair. Of this room. Be honest, that sensible, ever-knowing voice inside her whispered. It’s his presence that you don’t want to be out of.
“Are you?”
She shrugged. “I said I would. But I don’t feel like talking to anyone right now.” She dried her cheeks once more, but miraculously the flow had stopped. Adam Carlsen, responsible for 90 percent of the department’s tears,
had actually managed to make someone stop crying. Who would’ve thought?
“Though I feel like the free alcohol could really help.”
He stared at her pensively for a moment, biting the inside of his cheek.
Then he nodded, seeming to reach some sort of decision, and stood with his hand held out to her. “Come on.”
“Oh.” She had to crane her neck to look up at him. “I think I’m going to wait a bit before I—”
“We’re not going to the social.”
We? “What?”
“Come on,” he repeated, and this time Olive took his hand and didn’t let go. She couldn’t, with the way his fingers were closing around hers. Adam looked pointedly at her shoes, until she got the hint and slipped them on, using his arm to keep her balance.
“Where are we going?”
“To get some free alcohol. Well”—he amended—“free for you.”
